The De Grendel vineyards are 7km away from the Atlantic Ocean and lying on slopes at 200m above sea level . The vines are 7-10 years old and bring a yield of 5-7 tonnes per hectare at 2,300 vines on the same surface .
You’ve hit the nail on the head! OMG, I’m 7 months pregnant and I’m getting all the “you look ready to pop now/you’re huge!” I just have to remember yoga breathing so I don’t punch anyone
Ha ha ha I remember that lovely lady saying she had had a party the night before and didn’t want a double hangover but remember suspiciously thinking she might be pregnant! Also. I might poke the shit out of your gorgeous belly. Simply because I’m so happy for you my friend!! Loving reading these post!! Love you even more! XOXO
I can’t believe I haven’t tried this pairing yet!
I love that the dishes look substantial and that’s it’s not the same old cheese and wine or biltong and wine
HAHAHA oh Shante, you are gonna be one fiercely awesome mama bear. Not that I would’ve done so prior to reading this, but I solemnly promise to never kiss your baby on the mouth.
Ha ha ha Duane in the bar is the funniest thing!! Also. That braai room when that tenant was in there. I only have a few words: packets over the packets over my shoes. Cannot believe ANYONE could live like that. VOM. But you guys have done an AMAZING job!!
Lol, I almost died of laughter. I might be a year late reading this, but heck, it is one witty and informative post and very much relevant to me, a relatively new blogger.
Really am.so so proud of you my daughter….Well done…And I know you will do everything you put your mind to and your heart in…to your very very best…Love you so amazingly…Dad
The best thing about Spring is seeing all the flowers come up and the blossoms – we live near an apple orchard and it looks so beautiful once the season changes.
This spring I am looking forward to drinking cases of crisp Sauvignon, liters of Chenin and OCEANS OF CHARDONNAY. Basically all the beautiful, chilled white wine in SA.
HI Shante, Spring is all about new beginnings and like you, I’ve just started my own business so would love to celebrate with these delicious Beaumont Wines!
I also have not had a great relationship with my mom but as soon as I became a parent it changed. Everything I didn’t understand became clear to me. I’m just grateful that I still have her in my life still. Great post!
However, having a baby has also taught me something surprising about writing and drama. Writing With a Baby . Your characters are your babies , and I’m realizing that having a child of your own helps you become a better parent to your characters. Watching her in action has taught me to swallow my pride and just ask for what I need. Then, all of a sudden my screen went blank. My little baby girl had hit the power button and shut my computer down.
Agree whole heartedly.Mutual respect and kindness, some great wine and wonderful chocolate and the ability to laugh and not sweat the small stuff. Year 24 is a breeze and looking forward to the great anniversary present in year 25!
Okay, I need you to send me a voice note that clearly depicts how we say “forehead” – because I had no idea we say it differently?! (May have tried to say it out loud like a seal. Still not getting it. HELP.)
Shante… feeling your pain. Thanks for a real raw and honest post. We all have similar battles. Sometimes we need to hear another’s story to gain perspective on own journeys. Xoxo
It takes great risk and courage to share about anything that is personal to oneself…But more importantly, it takes extraudinary belief in oneself to be courageous…in risking…
We are so very proud of you Shante..so grateful to God for his continuos work in your life and take great joy in seeing you become more and more the woman after Gods own heart..
Our own lives have been blessed beyond measure by you…and we are challenged by the deepening of your faith in God..
.You and your siblings are our treasure and immense joy…and there is no doubt in my mind that your brother, Jhordan salutes you
Dad
This resonated deeply with me, haha. I have SUCH a sweet tooth. In January I decided to quit store-bought chocolate, and ever since then I’ve been stocking up on the vegan bounty bars from Thank Goodness at the Oranjezicht Market each week. They are absolutely delicious and just one curbs all my cravings. Plus, knowing that they’re full of coconut and selenium makes me feel better about the fact that they have a little cacao and agave in them 😉 Unfortunately they’re pretty pricey but I eat less and have totally noticed a change in my energy levels (for the better). Good health is worth a bit extra cash, right?
I need to get myself to the market! I love Bounty bars so do they have a similar taste? (just minus all the nonsense).
I agree with you, If I spend more, I’m inclined to make the food last longer and not just mindlessly binge
Sad thing is, I spent a better part of the day thinking of things I do well as a mom and most times there was direct evidence of the opposite. I salute the mom’s that really do rock motherhood. For me most times it’s a symphony of noise with perhaps a single note coming through clearly.
This is not a bid for your sympathy vote, but a view to the reality of trying to parent well and not knowing what you’re actually doing.
Hi Karin, thank you so much for sharing. I don’t think anyone knows what they ate doing…half of the time I’m relying on instinct and green tea. In 20 years time, I might be able to look back at what I’ve done and truly be at peace
Oh Wow! I needed to hear THIS today! Been having a rough few weeks where it’s all about mommy and no one else. And I too have felt frustrated, irritated and annoyed. But I’m taking your hubby’s words now too: She is showing me how much she loves me in the only ways she knows how. Thank you for sharing!
So lovely to read this – it’s true, they love us so uniquely! We all need reassurance and I’m so glad Mr H said that to me because I’m hugging Rosie so much more….she’s probably getting irritated with me!
I flew with my children a lot when they were small. Twice from Texas to SA with a 1 & 3 YO without husband ? (fortunately my parents were nearby) Once to Australia with 3&5 YO alone. It’s not so bad though. Quite do-able if you’re prepared. I wrote a few tips in an article here if it helps: https://missmelissawrites.com/2015/11/29/flying-with-children/
Have a great time !!
Bookmarking this post for ideas for future! I’ve said to myself that I need to be doing more adventurous stuff – instead of visiting old favourites, so this is perfectly timed!
ReplyMariska GoussardSeptember 21, 2017 at 2:28 am
I loved this post and your pictures are simply gorgeous! So sorry you had to deal with a few difficult situations over there – a lost passport would have pushed me to my limits in no time!
This is hilarious by the way! This bit I can actually picture: “If another parent falls out of their car in their pjs, I swiftly push them back into the vehicle and hold the door closed until they relent and drive back home to change”.
I am so sorry for your loss and what you are going through. I have sadly been through a miscarriage too and I could really relate to everything you wrote. Sending lots and lots of love and thank you for sharing with us xxx
Thank you so much Mariska, and I’m so sorry for your loss. I thought about not sharing, but I’m not ashamed of it, I think, if people can be open about it, then it’s a glorious way to heal. Thank you for sharing your past with me. x
Oh Shantè I am so very sorry for your loss. I too have experienced a very early miscarriage(My very first pregnancy) but did go on to have 3 very healthy full term ones and had to believe that there was a greater reason for not being able to meet my first baby. You may never know what it is but know that it most certainly is not your fault.
Thank you Celeste. I’m holding fast to the that faith and that plan, knowing that ultimately there is a purpose for everything and if and when the next one comes, I’ll be just ever more grateful. xx
Thank you so much for sharing and I am so sorry for your loss. Thinking of you. We in the still trying for number 1 phase so totally with you on the whole waiting period..the ovulation ..the maybe I am the maybe I am not…but we keep trying and believe the right time will come! Sending you Lots of strength…:-)
Thank you for your comment Olivia. Man, the trying period is so tough, and can be super stressful. The waiting game is what gets to me the most and the inability to share your news until you’re out of the danger zone of 13 weeks. I wish you all the best and hope to see a bump soon!
Oh my goodness, these leggings look AMAZING!!!! I fully agree with you: rather fork out a little bit more and get a decent pair of leggings instead of, as you mentioned, buying a new inexpensive pair every two months. It adds up pretty quickly. I am definitely going to spoil myself with a pair as well!
You are so right: empathy really is a gift. From harsh experience the last four years I came to realise that most people really have NO idea how to sympathise without somehow turning the focus on themselves. I think traumatic situations make people very uncomfortable as they are not skilled in what to say/not say and then the first thing they offer is unsolicited advice. Most of the time with good intentions of course, but it irks me every single time. That’s why I made it an absolute mission to learn how to sympathise and emphasise correctly. It is literally always better to say as little as possible and avoid saying things that could hurt this person that is already down and out while trying to hold it together. Sadly this doesn’t seem to be quite as common/default as it should be and I totally understand your frustration with it.
I am really sending you lots of love/hugs, I am thinking of you and I hope you will have a good break over the holidays.
I’m so sorry for your loss Shante. I don’t know your personally, nor have I experienced the loss of losing a baby but I can sympathize with you as a women and a mom who knows all too well how excited we get from the moment we see that faint line on a stick. The loss has to be the hardest and I pray you find peace day by day. I salute you for Sharing your story so bravely xxxx
Thank you for the mention, lovely lady 🙂 There are so many great SA blogs out there that I had no idea about until the Instastorie game. I love this iniative, so thank you … again… lol
Some of my very favourite humans and blogs on this list ❤️ Prepare to fall in love with the writers, their writing and their stories. These are some of the most important and influential people in my life x
I’ve also noticed how the same bloggers promote the same products/brands on social media. This probably means that PR companies only notice/use these bloggers for their campaigns. It might be because of following or whatever but I’m glad you brought the topic up. There are so many bloggers that I never knew about who I discovered through the insta story game.
I literally got goose bumps as I read this, thank you for sharing the sentiments of so many. I’ve been seeing so much of this and you’ve really just written it all in such a nice way. Thanks for listing my blog. Your blog is awesome by the way, going to do some reading tonight with a lovely glass of wine 🙂
Thanks for sharing this post on the SA Blogger Facebook page, which is how I came across it and happily so, stumbled upon this blog for the first time too 🙂
Thank you so much for writing this post! More people in PR need to be aware that:
a) POC bloggers exist
b) We put in just as much (or more!) effort as our white counterparts
c) They’re missing out on a very huge audience!
Parenting blogs isn’t my niche but I’m so happy that you’ve included so many POC bloggers! Well done!
I love this post and I think it is apt as I have personally felt that there are many preferences, whilst I think it is ok to have preferences, I don’t think it should be dependent on the colour of our skin. You have so eloquently expressed a sensitive reality which I am sure not many would be brave enough to do, I applaud you for this. It certainly is food for thought. Thank you for including my blog on the list.
I think your goals are absolutely realistic and as long as you have that change of paradigm, you will achieve it, just keep reminding yourself. I also feel that it is great that you’ve posted about it – it sort of creates some sort of accountability – like what if..some of your readers follow up to see how you are doing? If you know what I mean…
I wish you all the best in achieving your goals and more this year 🙂
It’s so cute, I can also see it being part of stationery – for the desk, I am sure kids will love it as well. For those people who enjoy having little ornaments in their cars…can see it working there too. I love the personalised touch.
As a blogger of colour, I follow mostly other bloggers of colour and can agree. There are many POC bloggers with big/decent-sized followings that make great content and actually influence their followers. I come across more each and every day, and I don’t mean newbies but established bloggers that I haven’t heard about before because I didn’t step outside my normal reading (I follow quite a few on your list already, but will check the ones I don’t know out). I agree brands are definitely losing out on huge markets by putting themselves in a pigeon-hole.
Let’s hope in 2018 brands will be more inclusive with their online campaigns.
My little blog is over at http://www.osoinspired.com, I blog about beauty, lifestyle and fitness. I’d love it if you check it out and add it to your list.
Excellent post. Thank you for touching on this issue. I hope that the blogger circle does grow and become more ‘colourful’.
This post also prompted me to get back into nurturing my ‘ baby’, http://www.glamhipsterdiaries.com. Consistency has been my biggest struggle over the last few months.
Thanks for sharing. I’ve discovered new readings from this post and I’m most definitely permanently adding ‘through my wine glass’ to my reading list. We really should support each other more as bloggers whether a beginner or a seasoned blogger.
Such a great post. It’s easy for us to feel like we’re really never going to get anywhere, be as successful as our favourite fairer skinned bloggers, but posts like this give me hope…for everybody <3
Thank you for including me on the list <3 I will definitely be adding some of these blogs to my list!
Great post! Thanks for touching on this issue. I’d love to be added to your list. My blog is about travel in South Africa and beyond. https://inafricaandbeyond.com
Girl, start a war man, start a friggen war! lol Only kidding.
Look, I must admit, I bite my tongue A LOT because I’d hate to have a large group of people not like me. But like, this is 2018 and it’s time to keep it REAL.
Is there an elite group of bloggers? Uhh, yes. Are they are all white? Uhhh, yes for the most part. Have I ever felt personally victimised by Regina George? Definitely! (Added that last one for nostalgia).
I don’t own a DSLR camera (4 kids, and all that) and I dont spend my pocket money on blog redesigns (4 kids… like I said)… Do I blame it on white privilege and the fact that I want my farm back? No. But I sure do love saying stuff… and I love that I have a blog to say stuff on. So say it I will.
I probably wont get all the campaigns, but thats okay. Coz, hey, a brand is a business and maybe the “business” wants to work with a blog that looks like a magazine, and mine looks like an old Readers Digest that someone used to prop the backdoor open with. Okay. That’s fine. But how about we all start being a little bit more aware of each other? Maybe that will help to ease the current discomfort. (and yes, if you’re still sitting there going “huh? what discomfort” then you need to reread yesterdays post). (p.s. I think that flat lays are from the devil) (Im kidding guys)
Thank you for being brave enough to say things that other people arent!
Your writing! Wow! Love this comment!!! especially the ‘and yes, if you’re still sitting there going “huh? what discomfort” then you need to reread yesterdays post’ hahahaha! and the flatlays part, because they really are the devil, I spend hours doing the dam things, but 5 seconds to do a candid shot of my lil gremlin! Why flaytlays, why do you choose to torment me! xx
Beautiful read. Thank you for sharing these sentiments in an elegant but impactful read.
My blog is a lifestyle blog focusing on healthy vegan recipes and raising empowered children. http://lifesatreat.co.za/
I thought I was the only one seeing this. It’s so discouraging to enter a market where you don’t even know whether you will be valued or not. Hopefully this will change and we will start seeing more POC working with brands.
I just started a Beauty, Hair and Lifestyle blog a few months back
Prettypalesa.co.za
I read the teepee example in your post, but in no way thought you were attacking any teepee making company. Amazing what some people focus on and the messages they take away from the very same article…..just interpreted so differently.
I also never read anything about disregarding the work and more so, the hard work that white people put into their blogs.
My initial comment on the first post was that it becomes unsettling and sad to wonder if you’ll ever get a break. If your work will ever speak for itself. And to sometimes think that break won’t come because of the colour of my skin…..it’s hard, but many of us keep going. A lot of the bloggers in your previous post have been blogging for years…they are putting the work in…but for some, the break will never come. I removed my comment though, because I didn’t want to offend anybody.
Another lovely post, so well written. And a secret coloured….who knew??? lol. Thanks for sharing some insight into your life as well.
Shante, you are the best! Thank you for being brave enough to just say these things! And the secret coloured part, wow, who would have thought, my Grandfather was a Cape Malay, and when my very white granny fell in love with him, she was disowned by her family. People suck, but they can suck less if they are just open to having conversations!
I love this – thank you for including me in the list, and wow – there are so many bloggers on here that I wasn’t already following. So much has already taken place in terms of supporting each other in just the last 24hours since this post went live. It’s amazing. YAY for bringing this to everyones attention and for making the circle bigger!!! xxx
I’m all for diversity and breaking barriers. I know of a big South African blogger who has a really big audience, but can’t get paid because he posts content that has been labeled as “too edgy”. His audience clearly doesn’t find offence in his content, yet brands don’t want to work with him because of ideological bias. That’s also a horrid form of exclusion.
But we have to remember that your audience size, and who is in your audience matters. If I look at the comments here and follow the links, it becomes pretty clear that this is a group if bloggers that all engage with each other’s content. But where are the outsider, the non-bloggers, the ones who are not commenting just so that they can link back to their own blog?
I’m a POC, but I don’t know all that many POC bloggers that actually have a big audience outside of the blogger circles they run in. What is our POC-audience worth, if only bloggers know other blogs, but they average guy or girl on the street doesn’t know any of those blogs?
I think we all as bloggers have to start being honest about who our audience really is. Because at the moment we are lying about our audience to each other and to ourselves.
j/k – but what’s your blog address? Don’t see it as part of your comment and would love to see what your blog is like.
I think parenting blogs are a bit of a different kind of tribe. We might all engage with each other’s content, but that’s also because we’re interested in many similar things, like what to feed our kids or how to wean or how to lose baby weight or deal with people trying to judge us for our parenting styles. So yes, there might be a bit of a circle jerk tendency of all reading and commenting on each other’s blogs, but that’s because we’re more than /just/ bloggers.
What my daughter didn’t mention is that although her dad, that’s me comes from the Transkei, he, that means me, came from 10 different nationalities…including from two extremes; Xhosa and we were neighbours to Nelson Mandela…how’s that for name dropping, not that any one remembers…except me when I am depressed and instead of test driving a Mercedes or an Audi or a BMW, I name drop the Xhosa thingy…neither works mind you…and Portuguese…Oh and talking about Portuguese, my great and I mean very great grandfather was a prisoner of a Portuguese ship that was shipwrecked off the Port St John’s coast…Am I famous or what…
On with the story…Most people would be excited coming from 10 different nationalities, but, not me…You see, when the then Apartheid Government introduced the Nationalization Act way back when, and many folks will remember that Act, one of the most divisive, derogatory, dehumanizing and debilitating acts ever to be introduced by supposedly humans…my family and millions of colured families were completely and utterly divided and segregated…by an act that decided who was what because of their colour and hair type and where that what should live…
Because of being of different nationalities, the then Apartheid Government, could not decide which race camp my family should or could belong to, my dad, and he looked like Anthony Quinn the Actor…was declared unclassified….yep you guessed it, he was a non anything…So what did that mean, each of his kids, that’s the four siblings, were non classified…How’s that for an identity crises.??
Every day I wished that I was either white or black or even Indian, at least I would be someone…But, as time went on, and as God became real to me…mind you it took him quite a while to get thru to me, cos I had tried just about everything to discredit him, and many white Christians, to my shame, will tell you how much they suffered and crumbled at my arguments that God did not exist and my treatment of them…On a wonderful, some of them are my closest friends to this day and i am blessed to have them in my life.
Moving on…I decided to leave South Africa because I did not want to fall in love with some beautiful women only to find out that she was my cousin, as that had happened a couple of times…just one of the consequences of the Nationality Act…So off to the UK I went, for surely, I would find a women who was not related to me…I found her – a blond white from somewhere near London…and married her
Upon hearing that Emma was pregnant, I was ecstatic, and could not wait to see our child…Shante was our first born – maybe you might like to ask her why we named her Shante??? Now you would have thought, being off colour, our daughter would have at least some or one off the ten nationalities in her…but not a chance…a total blond curly child…a real Shirley Temple….
I hoped that as the days went by, this little blond thing would get darker…but God was not listening to me..he was looking at a much bigger picture….All four of our kids were white…but each with very noticeable and distinguishing features from the Ten Nationalities from me…Listen to Shante sing and you will hear a Whitney Houston and a Aretha Franklin voice…not to mention her justice and don’t suffer fools gladly attitude…gifts from her father…But look at her gift with words and creativity and you will see her mom…
Ok i thought, they not like me in colour, but lets hope they marry a black person cos that way i would at least have dark grandchildren…God is still not listening to me..and i am so glad he isn’t…os i would just mess things up terribly if i had my own way…Now we have a gorgeous granddaughter who we love so very much…But she could get dark later on…hehehehe
I have over time, come to realize that nothing in our lives is arbitrary. It’s all for a purpose and most amazingly, God decided how you would be born. Regardless of the circumstances of our birth or who our parents are, God had a plan in creating us.
It doesn’t matter whether our parents were good, bad, or indifferent. God knew that those two individuals possessed exactly the right DNA genetic makeup to create the custom “you” he had in mind.
Yes, I am aware that some of us might wish that we had different set of parents, “how could God have chosen them”?, you may well ask!
Maybe my own kids ask that, all I can do is make sure that they learn to feel loved, accepted and believed in, so that they never ask that question but become proud of the choice of parents that God had for them.
But, it’s not just down to me, I must and want to credit Shante’s extraordinary mother – Emma, my amazing wife, for the incredible balance and dept of purpose she brings to each of the kids…the way she enables each to know how special they are in a world that might take umbrage coming from a man of Ten different nationalities…
To each of my kids…see what you are meant to be and pursue that with all your hearts…but in doing so, always be mindful of others who would do with helping hand in reaching for their dreams in a world that will always try to hold them back because of what they light look like or what they might be or from where they come from….So whatever you choose kids, choose well
We could never be more proud of our daughter Shante…for all that she has become – never love her husband, Brett more – for al that he means to Shante and never be more grateful to God for our extraordinary granddaughter, Lily Rose, whom we just adore….Last but not least, never be more thankful and humbled for the incredible gifts in the lives of our other children, Jhordan, Rohan and Adehles – all precious in the sight of our Heavenly Father
I would LOVE to start taking pictures with an amazing DSLR but unfortunately it hasn’t reached my budget as yet!! Thanks for writing this post and clearing things up, Shante.
Great read…you make some valid points and I also believe if we all (South Africans) would just support each other more, regardless of background, this country will soar! I am not a Lifefstyle blogger and clearly I am not a mommy blogger, but I think the principle of your article rings true across the board.
Thanks so much Jurie – I am 100% with you! I found starting my blog to be so difficult because it can be so cliquey. We forget that by empowering others, we do the very same for ourselves!
Love this! Always get frustrated when I’d go to events in Joburg and it was mainly white, affluent mommy bloggers with maybe one or two PoC. Thanks for writing this and hope it’s a useful resource for people looking to find more awesome bloggers to follow – I’m already a huge fan of many people on this list. <3
Great post. Last year I experienced racism from a well known brand where they indirectly told me that they can’t work with me because of the colour of my skin…reading your post gives me hope. Im glad that others are also noticing what is happening and I really hope that things change this year. I would love to be added to your list I am a beauty blogger.
This, is just breathtaking. Cindy, I hope you read this and know that all that lives inside of you, shone our through these pictures. Not just the beautiful make up and gorgeous dress, or even the magical flower crown, the love for you family and the struggles and the kindness and the hope, all those things are so visible in these pics. Well done Shante, gosh what a great shoot. xxx
Cindy is the most beautiful person that I cyber stalk! Her hair, her body and her face! Even when she isn’t wearing make up I think she is so so pretty! And as a person, and a mother, and a wife…. well I would love to be even half as awesome as she is 🙂 These pics are so incredible I just can’t choose my favourite!
Absolutely stunning Cindy, you look beautiful with and without make up. I can relate completely I have not gone a day facing public without base on since I was around 13. I too will not even take a delivery until I’m made up with my mask and I totally relate to feeling good when it looks good and bad and Moody when it doesn’t. Well done kn being transparent about it all and inspiring others like me x
Wow…wow…wow! These pictures are EVERYTHING! I felt as if I was right there…this haunting sort of forest movie playing out.
Great article Shante and Cindy! I had the same issues with skin during my last pregnancy, but I’m realising it’s not as bad. My ‘thing’ though, would be my weight. It’s always made me feel as if it defines me and what people think of me….well they think nothing besides: Wow she’s fat. It has limited me from accepting social invitations, from wearing nice clothes. Always frumpy, hiding. Also I was a success story a few years ago and lost a lot of weight…all regained now. In 2017 I definitely tried to get rid of the shackles I had put on myself.
I’m not happy with my weight, but it doesn;t mean I’m not worthy of being a person and that I have to stop existing until I one day lose the weight…AGAIN….
Such a great article. It’s amazing whenever I see Cindy’s pictures I think, what a stunning woman…that hair! Those cute kids! It was only when she opened up about her skin I realised…wow…we all have our demons I guess.
Your incredible pictures took my breath away! Like literally! I immediately switched to my laptop as these pictures are way too gorgeous to look at on a tiny mobile device. You are an incredibly, insanely talented photographer and Cindy is the most gorgeous model! I am still speechless! Cannot wait for for the rest of the series.
I can not fault you in what you have said those bloggers you have mentioned never mind a few others are respected in the blogging community and the bonus is they are super fabulous people. Great insight and so much truth excuse me while I go read the follow up
Oh my goodness me. I’m freaking sobbing at this incredible shoot! Thank you Shante for giving me the space to speak my truth and thank you for capturing this incredible photos. I loved working with you and Tam and I am so proud to be a part of this series. BLOWN AWAY <3
It’s weird that these comments are about me, when you’re in it, you don’t feel strong, you feel weak and helpless and then you get through it somehow and people see you as strong and it’s a weird feeling. Like what did I do to deserve these comments and for people to think this about me. Thank you so much everyone <3
Once again I am completely blown away! WOW! Just WOW!
Maz, you are one of the most incredible people I know and one of the people I will miss most when we leave here!
xoxo
These photos and this beautiful beautiful woman are breathtaking. There is magic in your voice Maz, you will continue to change the world wherever you touch it. And Shante, your incredible gift to capture the soul of these beautiful women is phenomenal. Well done for an incredible series x
Holy cow! I felt empowered reading this Maz. You’re amazing and beautiful and this piece showcased that. Shante, what gorgeous images and I totally got your vision. Loved the red against the black. Gorgeous photos!!
My mind cannot even handle how absolutely BEAUTIFUL you are Maz! I loved reading and I’m loving this series.
Shante – you are amazing, these pictures are gorgeous.
Incredibly courageous of you, Maz , to be so open and honest in a public forum – especially in view of your vulnerability to bullying. Brave, brave woman! I salute you – and Shante for the images and providing safe platform to speak out. Respect to you both.
This was very moving and dramatic. Also very revealing. From an acquaintance point of view, I had no idea Maz’s personality and character ran so deep. Beautiful story and beautiful work Shante and team for peeling back these layers and giving us insight into some truly extraordinary women!
Maz you are such an inspiration and a truly beautiful soul. Thank you for sharing your story.
Shante, you are incredible. You have captured the essence of Maz’s story beautifully. Your pictures really tells a thousand words. Truly talented woman.
I am always at such a loss for words after reading these posts, they are so raw AND beautiful at the same time.
I have also really enjoyed getting to know some of my old favourite and new favourite bloggers stories and what brought them to where they are today.
You are a vision in these images and your story made me cry but I am not going to give you pity, that is not what you want, so I am going to say that you are a beautiful, strong and powerful woman with a special talent to bring out all the feels with your words.
This is just incredible, and so are you.
This series has been one of my favourite things I have ever seen on a blog.
Kerry, thank you. It’s been an incredible journey and putting it into writing has just exposed so many silly negativeness I had which just isn’t true. I just only hope the story can give hope where it is needed.
Beautiful Shante, your story touched me so deeply that I found it difficult not only to find words, but to actually find my voice. You told your story in such a delicate yet profound way and I’m in awe of you right now. Reading your story, your pain and then how the birth of your daughter opened your heart to this incredible love again is wonderful. And isn’t it amazing how the opening of your womb caused an opening of the heart! Like a flower you have opened and become even more beautiful than you already were.
I also lost my brother 34 years ago. I was 23 and he was 26 and because we were the last two of 8 kids, we were very close. So one sunny morning 34 years ago, I kissed him goodbye as I dropped him at work, not knowing that as I watched him walk away I would never see him again. For many years I would search for him on a crowded street or shop or anywhere thinking, it was just a mistake and that he was alive somewhere and I suppose that was how I coped.
So thank you for your story, we all need to be reminded of how God, in His infinite wisdom can bring us out of darkness and into His beautiful light.
Never forget how strong, courageous and breathtaking beautiful you are.
love n blessings
Connie
As children and now as adults, I have and will continue to always admire both your strength and courage. The first time I heard this tale, I didn’t know how to react, well as a teenager who does? Now as an adult I still don’t have the right words, other than love and admiration for you and your whole family.
So, that made me cry. I just think back to how awful I acted in so many situations, but I’m so grateful for your love, and for your friendship when it all felt like too much. Thank you Clare
This speaks to me in such a profound way. Death has been such a big part of my life. My cousin, who was more like my brother was killed at 13. He was riding a motorbike and a truck knocked him down. His Death brought such suffering to my family. Not only did he die but a part of us too, for a long time our family was filled with ugly. My father introduced him to bikes and he felt responsible for the death. Your story has so much meaning to me. Thank you for bravely sharing it. ?
Thank you my friend. We sometimes forget how truly intertwined we are with death, how unforgiving he is, and how terrible it is to be “left behind”. Thank you for sharing with me my precious – the beauty is that the cracks that break us, make us so much more inviting, and loving
Shante every post is in this series is moving. Your commitment dedication and bravery is remarkable. Your strength is an inspiration. I hope more people will read this and find comfort in knowing that there is indeed a light at the end of the tunnel.
My husband’s sister and brother died. She when she was 2 years and him a few days before his 16th birthday. Every day is hard for him, more so because our eldest child is a copy/paste of his brother. Your story brought me to tears and reminded me of how far my husband, and his parents, have come in the years following their deaths. Thank you for this ?
Oh my goodness I have no words this is breathtaking. Maz – warrior woman- you stand for so much that is good with the world. Thank you for being so brave and true. Much love
These photos of you are exceptional and tell the story without the words. Your words are always so true and clear and pierce through any emotional distance we place between ourselves and other people’s pain. You may not have intended to be part of this series, but I believe this series was born of the need for you to share this here and allow you to see yourself as the exquisitely beautiful, strong and talented woman we all see. Sending you love x
I love this series! I’m so glad you finally gave in, and decided to feature yourself – thank you for sharing your story. You’re so strong! And the photos are gorgeous! You look stunning! ❤️
Shante, I don’t actually even have any words. Death too has touched me a number of times with its cold hand in my adult life, but most recently with my own Father. An incomplete story was ours before he died nearly 6 years ago and so suddenly, and there was no chance for words of forgiveness between us and never will be. I’m sorry for your loss and experiences when you should have been carefree and dancing through your childhood, but I am grateful that you have experienced your healing. This post has been a huge trigger for me, but I really needed to read it.
Celeste, I’m so sorry to read about the death of your father. There are no words I can offer that would bring any comfort, just know that by sharing this, your heart can become cherished by someone else, someone who wills for you to heal
Dearest Shante, it took ne also years to own myself. Now i only tell things as they are, feel things as they are. Im in love with this post. I’m in love with this you.
I have just discovered your series… Thank you for your courage on sharing such a personal part of yourself. I am in awe…. This touched me very deeply ❤️
Your story is heartbreaking but also quite remarkable!
I just wanted to say one thing….. don’t ever confuse pity with compassion. I made that mistake during my 7 year journey through infertility and recurrent pregnancy loss. I cut myself off from everyone because I hated their pity, which made me feel small and uncomfortable. It took me a long time to realize that because of my own insecurities and not feeling good enough, I saw pity when in actual fact it was love and compassion that I was rejecting and turning away from.
xxx
Thank you so much Sharon. It is true, pride has done me so many wrongs, it has closed so many doors that I will never be able to open again. It even turned me against my own mother when really, she knew me better than anyone else. xx
this entire series… I have no words, such beauty born from such pain and heartache, I cannot imagine, thank you for allowing people to read these stories and about the journeys that have made each of the 4 of you who you are today, incredible beauty.
This post, this series, it is incredible. That there are those among us who conceal these amazing stories beneath layers upon layers of time and hurt – it just boggles my mind. That saying about being kind because we all have a story is more true than we can imagine.
I admire your strength, one I’m finding is a core of myself, too, in a place I thought was filled with weakness.
My heart breaks for your childhood loss, but what a gift the birth of your daughter must have been! I hope you share this with her when she is old enough to understand.
It is so true, we walk alongside people and we never know what they have faced or what we say or do that might affect them. Thank you so much for your lovely, supportive comments
The experience of death when you are very young can indeed colour the rest of your life, if you let it. I know. It sears the soul and must be used to gain strength. Shine like a pearl, love those close to you and grow. You are finding your way, let it be a happy path from now on, with the past just a memory. xxxx
Shante, wow, this has left me speechless. Your writing is so beautiful, your pictures are stunning. Everything about this article is just breath taking. What a tragedy you’ve been through, cannot imagine having to go through this, but you’ve made it and through all of it, you are still able to shine so brightly! Keep on shinning!
This was hard to read, because I hold you so dear and the fact that you went through so much pain upsets me. That’s too much pain. You are incredible. You are strong. You are smart. You are loving, caring and loyal. You are fierce AF. And you are an amazing mom. I am so glad you decided to write your story as well. I want to write a more profound comment, but I am crying too much. lol
I read this with a lump in my throat. It’s so hard to read any of the stories in this series and not feel like it’s a personal part of who you are as a person, a story told through someone else’s words. If I had died from my ordeal, Oden would have lived without a mom and all the things you say you feel about your beautiful boy not having a dad, are things that played over and over in my mind, I can’t die because he needs a mom. I’m so truly deeply sorry for your loss. I can’t even begin to imagine the pain you’re going through but I can say that your son is so blessed to have a mother with your strength. WOW. I’m just blown away.
To the team, THANK YOU for making this possible. For sharing this story and our stories. I don’t have enough words to express how powerful this series is!
I had to stop after reading the first few lines. I wouldn’t want anyone at the office see me balling my eyes out. I will continue reading this later at home.
The photographs…ALWAYS gorgeous!
Ange, I can never read your mister’s name without my heart clenching. Every time you write about any of this, the feelings get more raw and powerful and that is your gift – you take your readers with you through all of it. Your blog is beautiful, it is a document of love for both your boys. These photos are everything as always Shante ❤️ And you totally caught the wicked sense of humour that is a hallmark of Angela’s being, and the haunting sadness just below the surface. Angie, you are exquisite my friend xx
My heart….
It is incredible what we can live through. Oh Angela, I think we all clutch at ourselves at the thought of losing our spouses, but to actually experience it must be truly heartwrenching. Your strength for Elijah is amazing and admirable. I hope you have people who can support you the way you have supported him.
Thank you so much for sharing this. You are such an inspiration.
I can relate to this in so many ways. I met/literally faced death for the first time when I was a teenager. And faced it again when I lost my dad. I was already pregnant with my daughter when I had to say goodbye to my daddy. The walls that I have built in my life are bigger than enormous. Giving birth to my child changed me for the better in so many ways. I still have a long way to go.
Reading your article made me miss the wine industry which I left to do accounting for the husbands company about 3 years ago. I loved it whilst I was in the middle of it and did find that the older – read more experienced hands – were always ready with some advice and help. The wine industry in South Africa is definietly a vibrant community and I am glad to see so many women entering the industry and making a success of it. Now that I am not in the wine industry anymore, I can say that I really don’t like Pinotage – sorry Pinotage guys and that I find Sauvignon Blanc too acidic – I always feel that it should still be either growing or sitting in some barrel somewhere instead of being in a bottle already. I do miss all the wine people –
I just love that there is so much freedom to enjoy what you like, once you realize that your own views matter. I am a fan of Pinotage but its a difficult beast to sell because it can be so wrong. I also loved how close everyone was and how you’re really all working towards one goal – global domination 😉
Lovely article. Except that part where you insult all Australian wines which are DELICIOUS! It’s so lovely reading about your journey into wine. Knowing who you are now, I’d have NEVER imagined a time when you didn’t love wine. Because wine is basically life. Oh and olives. Which I love too ;P
Hahaha, I do love Australian wines…but they have to be above a certain monetary amount because the cheapies they bring to England are very hot. I tried so hard to like olives because olive oil is gold, but I just can’t
Super congrats! And yeah, every pregnancy is different, although I found my boy pregnancies were similar and my girl one was different. Be kind to yourself and take it easy. The food cravings/aversions and the exhaustion are the worst for me too. Currently wishing I could sleep for days! Having a toddler and being pregnant isn’t a joke ( you’d think I’d learn my lesson… this is my 5th pregnancy and I’ve had toddlers with all but the first obviously!) Strengths to you and enjoy your trip to family!
Thank you Alet! I’m so excited to meet her, but I know that right now I need to revel in the moments of just being with Rosie…as well as all the getting ready and planning before baby is born
This post hit the nail on the head!!! I actually commented on this on twitter last week! People find it weird that I never ask that question but after battling with infertility I know better than to ask. Between very close friends we might tease and joke about having 4-5 kids but that is where it ends and even say to one another right after a birth time to start trying for the next. I have learnt you don’t know someone’s story and you really don’t know if they want kids or not. So it is none of your business. I had people ask me before I had a kid – you know you are not getting any younger and even after the kid was born it was always when is the next one coming. Not sure how that is their business. My MIL was the worst she could never ask me directly but would ask my SIL who thankfully would tell her I think you should ask your son not me 🙁
Sometimes you can joke, when you know who you’re joking with. I have no problem with my mum asking because she knows everything about me but if you’re not that close with someone, you’re treading into a mine field. Better to never ask than see the pain reflected in someone’s eyes
Literally cannot agree with you more – I get asked all the time and little do these people (some close to me) know that I’ve actuallh just taken another (negative) pregnancy test. I also had a miscarriage and I couldn’t believe how insensitive people were – “so are you going to try again now because you’re so fertile after a D&C”. Can you even ?
Drives me up the wall
It makes my skin crawl this lack of empathy – are we just programmed to blurt out these impersonal questions? Never mind the fact that you need time to let your heal and yourself mourn after a miscarriage and now they want you to throw yourself into it straight away!
Oh yes. Thank you. I agree with you so much. Although people have generally stopped asking now. I do tell them I did try to have another one (unsuccessfully) I don’t mind telling them that. But it’s still invasive.
Congratulations! I too was very nervous with my second pregnancy. First one ended in a miscarriage. This post reminds me of how emotional I was too. I cried and laughed so hard while watching Trevor Noah one night.
Isn’t hindsight wonderful?! I’m not thinking about having another baby any time soon (still emotionally scarred from the first time round!) but I agree, there are SO MANY things I’d do differently. Some I’d do the same, but most of the things I’d do differently have to do with my need for control over the situation. Every time I’ve just relinquished control and allowed my son to show me what he wants to do, things turn out better. If I ever decide to be insane and have another child, I will try my best to remember that!
I was very careful not to listen to too much advice because there is SO much of it and so many different methods. This time round, it’s definitely less trial and error BUT, saying that, each child is so different. The best thing we did was to choose to be parents that were more relaxed, like yourself – you’re so right about relinquishing control!
Congrats on baby bump 2.0! We had a bigger bed made and slept with baby 1 and baby 2 in the same bed. When baby one was more into the fact that he was still prince 1 he was fine moving back into his own room. We eventually moved both out of our room. They still got into bed when they wanted to but they loved their own beds. Mine never wanted to take a dummy and believe me I tried every type on the market! it looked so much easier with other Moms and the dummies but on the other hand most of them battled to get rid of the dummies some even had dummies at age 4/5. Good luck and you will get as much advise if not more from other people and I also had the when are you trying for ….question as I only have sons!
Thank you so much Juli! Rosie couldn’t stand a dummy….but now, she’ll sometimes pop one in her mouth but fun. It’s never been a comfort thing for her…I am the comfort. Whilst we are pretty relaxed parents, the hardest thing is not to compare ourselves, especially myself, to other parents. Each child is so different and you can’t fit them into a box
I’m right there with you. Our lb is due end July & im totally freaking out… I don’t know how I’m going to mange a toddler & a newborn 🙄
I’m also much less organized this time around- nothing is ready!
I am living in this bubble of “I’ll organize everything the month before”….because life really is too crazy…and maybe because I’m trying to deny it. Ha!
Hi, I felt the exact same panic before my second baby boy was born. I became terrified that I would never ever sleep again, never have a moment for myself again, and probably my worst fear : What if big brother hated him and tried to hurt him ?! So in the months leading up to babies birth I talked and showed big brother Daniel tiger episodes with a new baby. He was 2 1/2 and couldnt care less.I told myself I would handle things as the problems arose and that I’ ve handled everything with No 1 so far. That gave me some comfort. We were also potty training at the time. But that last month of pregnancy he just stopped using the potty , so we decided to wait till after baby and boy was I glad we did that. And them came the day for baby to arrive. And I will never forget that first moment when big brother saw his new baby brother for the first time. His little face lit up with the biggest smile and with wonder and pride in his voice he said : Thats my baby brother ! And yes there was jealousy but like all things with the kids we handled it in the moment and he loves his brother sooo much. So hang in there mama ! It’s tough , I wont lie. But you can do it.
I really need to sit Rosie in front of these Daniel Tiger episodes!
The sleep is a BIG one, we’re still not at a stage of Rosie sleeping through the night consecutively and it is draining…now add a newborn. When I see her around other babies, she is fascinated and so gentle, so that is a relief there.
Thank you for the encouragement, we often just need a little push to let us know we can do it
I just had #3 two days ago. When we were expecting #2 my son was already 2 and tuned 3 before she was born. We talked a lot about the baby and watched the Daniel tiger episodes a ton of times at his request. We also got him big brother books. We brought him around my friend’s newborn so he could see what a new baby was like. This time he was all ready but his sister who just turned two last week was the newbie. Being a full year younger than he was when he got his first sibling, she understands a lot less. We just emphasized being nice to babies the whole time. So far so good, but we just got home from the hospital today, lol.
Fortunately, my close friend is due a month before me so I definitely want to introduce Rosie to a newborn. She’s very soft and gentle with the idea of a baby, and other kids that are younger than her…I just know that there could be some jealousy issues.
Remember how you weren’t prepared for what you were going to face the first time around because no-one can prepare you for the changes of a baby. Juggling two is a lot more daunting – but essentially, it’s too late to back out now!
My advice, plan and prep for the Bumpette, but ultimately, calm down, things will fall into place, some days are going to be tough, but you will fall into a pattern that works for you and your family!
Shante there will be things that feel exhausting and tough and other things will be so much easier because you’ve faced them before and survived ….it wont be long before you can’t remember what it was like to be 3 because 4 is so right…no 2 babies are the same and because you will hopefully be more relaxed generally baby will probably relax more….i remember popping Mathew in the play pen as a new born ( as a way to protect him from little sister being tooo attentive) whilst I washed the pots and tidy kitchen, he cried and i thought you will just have to wait mate i have to get this done..by the time i got to him he’d fallen asleep . helen would never have done that unless cuddled!! oh forget about going to loo or showering in peace ever again…mine still chat to me through the door !!! 😉 you learn to accept help more readily and Rosie will be fine…they are very adaptable.
praying you relax and enjoy being pregnant xx love janet cuthbert
It was hard I’m not going to lie! For the actual day we had 2 nights in a swanky hotel and went nuts on room service, treatments, over priced dinners and are still recovering now! The good news is I’m now accepting and am 18 years old with 12 years experience!
That sounds like my kind of celebration – one where everything gets brought to me and I can just EAT. Maybe i can have a big-ass party next year as well… 😉
I loved this article about Cindy, I read her blog every now and then, so I went to her article first. I suffer from Alopecia, and whilst my personnal journey is about accepting – as there is no known cure – it definitely resonated with me about how I am trying to teach my children to not be body conscious, and to accept difference..
So so beautiful. I am so amazed by how many of us share such differently lives but such similar struggles. The heart break that comes with wanting so desperately to have a child. Ah man. Thank you so much for sharing Chanel!
Love birth stories and this was one amazing read. incredible how you labored so quickly. Cece is absolutely gorgeous and I’m sure was worth all that pain.
Great read. What is it about birth stories? They’re so interesting. I had 2 at home drug free and totally agree with you, people putting hands or instruments anywhere near your vagina is the worst bit. Thank GOd for my midwife, she was awesome, no doctors involved.
I would love to read about your home birth – I contemplated it with my first but I found South Africa to not be very clued up for it, or perhaps I didn’t do my research enough
I’m sitting here in tears, it feels like Nikki is speaking straight from my heart. Having also had three miscarriages, I know the pain, the anguish, the trauma she describes. I love the concept you’ve chosen here – the quote about the laughing stars was almost my undoing this morning. Thank you Nikki for sharing in words and Shante for illustrating through images what my heart feels xx
I recently started my own business and therefore I do not have a website yet. I do however have a facebook page. It is Gabz Fearfully & Wonderfully made with love.
I totally understand what Nikki went through. Having had a miscarriage, then a healthy baby, then 2 miscarriages and a blighted ovum, it is the most heart wrenching pain, especially when all your daughter wants is a baby sibling. The what if’s, anger, pain and heartache is awful. She finally got her baby sister when she was 6. We celebrated our rainbow baby’s 1st Birthday yesterday.
Thank you for the great giveaway! I’m in it to win it for my brand new little niece, Isla. As an only child, I was over the moon when my husband’s sister got pregnant – my chance to be an aunt! And I’m taking my responsibilities here very seriously! 🙂
ReplyAshleigh RosenbaumOctober 17, 2018 at 6:04 am
After not having one for my first baby and still battling sleep with a toddler I would love this for my next baby ( currently 7 months pregnant!) and be because it’s a surprise the grey version is perfect for me! Crossing fingers and toes!
I’ve never used any Pure Beginnings products before (shocking, I know) and I would LOVE to try their range. I’ve been sticking to another baby brand probably because I just don’t know any better about the products being used. Definitely a wake up call and a need to check and Google ingredients listed.
I used Pure Beginnings when they first came out with Elijah… and I’ve loved them ever since. Basically I’ve always been a hippy tree hugger and I don’t care for products that have junk in them… I’d rather make my own…
Love that this product is natural! So important for babies to have natural products on their skin! Pregnant with my first little one. So excited to use this range! Would love to win!
As first time dads to be, you can imagine that we are taking in as much advice as possible! Without a doubt Pure Beginnings has been on our baby registry from the moment we found out the good news, so here’s hoping we can tick this off our list 🙂
first time mom and my lil one has eczema I’ve bought tons of products I don’t know what to use on her anymore that would actually work, this would be a nice giveaway for us 🙂
Wow what an awesome review i have learned so many new things as a new mom
I would absolutely love to use this on my baby 😁thank you for the amazing advise
I’m the worst at lunchboxes but I always have emergency squish in the nappy bag for girls…..if it’s pear and rooibos I’ll sneak a taster as well. Omw have you tasted it? I’d love this prize
This is truly a great competition to win. I can relate to the squish life. @shante_hutton
My little son hates fruit, so I try and get as much nutrients in his body by Squish juice. Yogurt, Jelly and Custard. This would be a great competition to win, my son would be head over heels excited.
My oldest would polish off anything I put in front of him (still does), so gave me a false sense that I knew what I was doing when it came to weaning my daughter – well about that!! She isn’t a fan of most things I make and a lot of it ends up on the floor. But she does love these, which has been amazing! So my go to when we going out. At least i know she will eat something
I really don’t like the weaning process. I’m not one who enjoys cooking in the first place so to still do baby food is the pits for me. Goodies like these that are nutritious, healthy and ready to go are right up my alley!
I’d be absolutely delighted if I were to be given an opportunity to try this amazing brand for my little one. It’s super handy as well and looks super delish! Especially when you’ve got 2 fussy kids (can anyone say, ‘lucky mama’?!) haha I’ll add in our smoothie recipes for bub as he is now teething heavy so the zoku pop maker is a recipe for success, yum! My email is neelofah.h@gmail.com
I’d really love to be able to be given this opportunity as it’s my wedding anniversary coming up this month, 10th March along with my birthday on the 25th March. It’s been a crazy few months, what with getting retrenched just a month after giving birth then hubby getting retrenched after 15 years within 3 months of my retrenchment so it’s been alot of financial sacrifices, crazy chaos so no fancy schmancy or any celebrations here – this would be absolutely perfect! Keeping fingers crossed. Xx
Never heard the words “getaway” in a while!! I could actually cry! The last getaway my husband and I had, was our honeymoon two years back. Forgetting about responsibilities for two nights sounds like a dream come true. Never really had an opportunity to even think of a getaway because of obstacles. But this is beautiful.
I love my husband and son so much and this would be amazing. Especially the outdoors of nature and the pool. Since my little man adores any slight appearance of water he sees he just messes! Love it!
If unfortunately I don’t win this competition, Windfall Guest Cottages would be one for the books!
Oh wow this sounds like such a great prize! Would love to win. Not able to Like your Facebook page, though, would you mind posting the link again? Good luck to everyone 🙂
I am interested in opening a baby store that sell local brand here in south africa and also outside the country. But most local brand do not supply wholesale.
These are really good. Everything on this list is definitely needed especially snacks. The last thing you want in a confined car or plane is a hungry child.
I am a girl mom and a boy mom; my daughter never showed any interest in playing with dolls; my son enjoys it. I’m just happy that they are comfortable to play with the toys that they want to play with and not feel like they are pressured to stay in any particular box!
Ethan loved to play with dolls. As he got older though, I think the boys at his creche influenced him to stop playing with them. But he will still hold and cuddle some of Harper’s babies when he thinks we’re not looking. I have no issues with boys playing with dolls. Will they not grow up to be dad’s, uncles, husbands? Do we not want to teach them to be nurturing and loving to children?
Added to favourites! Thank you for taking the time to write this. Personally, I especially need a reminder every now and again to grow a thick skin (damn you perfect, beautiful instagram feeds) and understand my worth. x
Thank you so much darling – it was so needed for us
ReplyCharlene (@gee_whiskers)November 2, 2020 at 6:09 pm
This is one of the best Christmas gift guides I have ever seen! Thank you so very much for sharing this – I know this must have been a lot of work to put together but you made my life so much easier 😀
My plan was to hide 76543 chocolate eggs and then go and enjoy a bottle of wine while they search… Now I can enjoy a bottle of wine and a hot cross bun with these extra activities 😉 Thanks, Shante!
Thank you for compiling such a lovely list. I would love to chat sometime. I am the creator behind SNAPZ Dummy Strapz, this is our Facebook page
Perhaps you would be interested in reviewing our product?
We look forward to hearing from you 🙂 https://web.facebook.com/search/top?q=Baby%20Dummy%20Snapz
Okay I LOVE this!!! So many cool His & Her brands I didn’t know about. Thank you so much for sharing. And for that mention at the end… really appreciate it my friend. THANK YOU
Ah, honesty and subtlety, combined with wine and food. Only from my awesome niece!
Thank you so much Russ!
Oh Shante, you do have a way with words. Giggled hysterically throughout this piece. Also, love the blog design!
Thank you so much Jenny!! Can’t wait to add more food posts.
Hi Shante
How do I subscribe to receive your posts?
Please could you “follow” mine?
Warms
Julian
Super review and 100% true. Can’t wait for our 3rd visit in a couple of months.
Thank you so much Don – it really was amazing
I am now inspired to go traveling – I just love the photos, beautifully capturing McGregor
Lovely Photos. I’m definitely going for the Sunday lunch menu soon
Lekker wines there too
Now that I have a serious travel bug biting my ass, I feel like I need to see McGregor!! Thanks for sharing this with us!
Very well said 🙂
Thank you so much lovely
I really enjoyed this! Great post x
http://brightdreamerz.blogspot.co.uk/
The De Grendel vineyards are 7km away from the Atlantic Ocean and lying on slopes at 200m above sea level . The vines are 7-10 years old and bring a yield of 5-7 tonnes per hectare at 2,300 vines on the same surface .
Thanks to my father for making me aware of this website, this blog is truly awesome.
You’ve hit the nail on the head! OMG, I’m 7 months pregnant and I’m getting all the “you look ready to pop now/you’re huge!” I just have to remember yoga breathing so I don’t punch anyone
This is hilarious! I think I need to send this on to my Mother-in-law because I know she’s going to do number 1
Ha ha ha I remember that lovely lady saying she had had a party the night before and didn’t want a double hangover but remember suspiciously thinking she might be pregnant! Also. I might poke the shit out of your gorgeous belly. Simply because I’m so happy for you my friend!! Loving reading these post!! Love you even more! XOXO
Love the post!
This is really lovely. You’re daughter is going to feel the love from you a lot
So beautiful <3
Thank you so much lovely!
Wow! Love this, honestly 🙂
Driving in Cape Town is such a mission especially during the holidays, so I definitely want to see see 2016 without that hassle
Can we also have less people making a fuss over American brands opening in SA? Queue for doughnuts and bad-quality clothing is ridiculous
R560 TO STARE AT WAX FIGURES???? Holy wow! I was keen to do that one day when I go to the UK, but now, not so much. Thanks, but no thanks. Pffft!
It’s ridiculous right. And it’s always heaving inside too.
I am dreaming about a UK trip! And will obviously take ALL your advice when I do (one day). Because you’re my favourite British person.
Now to wait for the Rand to get stronger…. 🙁
I love the idea of walking everywhere! Great post
Love Black Sails!
Great pics
Thanks for the tips 🙂
I can’t believe I haven’t tried this pairing yet!
I love that the dishes look substantial and that’s it’s not the same old cheese and wine or biltong and wine
Great photos. Really paints it as a good place to visit
HAHAHA oh Shante, you are gonna be one fiercely awesome mama bear. Not that I would’ve done so prior to reading this, but I solemnly promise to never kiss your baby on the mouth.
*growls approvingly* Can’t wait to see the little cub
Ha ha ha Duane in the bar is the funniest thing!! Also. That braai room when that tenant was in there. I only have a few words: packets over the packets over my shoes. Cannot believe ANYONE could live like that. VOM. But you guys have done an AMAZING job!!
Oh my gooooodness – what a transformation! Epic!
Absolutely amazingballs!
I can’t wait to go and try these picnics for myself.
Great pics
Lol, I almost died of laughter. I might be a year late reading this, but heck, it is one witty and informative post and very much relevant to me, a relatively new blogger.
Always lovely to read a comment like this. So glad it gave you a good giggle 🙂
It really did. I’ve never seen blegging so eloquently explained 🙂 Thank you.
You have got one of the greatest webpages
I need to visit this place!
thumbs up!
Great post
*covers eyes* I don’t know if I can cope with anymore “trends”, I feel like my cravings are going insane
You should have mentioned how expensive strollers are! We’ve been looking for ages for one that we like but I can’t justify spending over 10k on one
I’m always looking for skin-friendly products for my kids, so glad I found this article
Recently ate here and LOVED every morsel. One of the best restaurants in Cape Town
Looks amazing. Do you know if they do a vegetarian option too?
WOOHOOOO! Yay for change! This is beyond exciting and I’m so happy you’ve taken the plunge. All the best for the future, dearest Shante!
Thank you my darling!
If anyone can make this change its you! Super proud of you my friend, and so excited for what’s to come xx
Thank you, you gorgeous thing
Wonderful Shante, following your dreams and heart might not be the best financially, but certainly the most rewarding. go for it!
Really am.so so proud of you my daughter….Well done…And I know you will do everything you put your mind to and your heart in…to your very very best…Love you so amazingly…Dad
I’d love to win these bottles and sip into Spring! (I’m following on all your social media accounts too)
The best thing about Spring is seeing all the flowers come up and the blossoms – we live near an apple orchard and it looks so beautiful once the season changes.
I’m most looking forward to the later sunsets, drinking a glass of wine with my SO
I’m most looking forward to drinking more white wine again. Heavy reds are great in winter but I’m craving warmer weather for some Sauvignon
This spring I am looking forward to drinking cases of crisp Sauvignon, liters of Chenin and OCEANS OF CHARDONNAY. Basically all the beautiful, chilled white wine in SA.
HI Shante, Spring is all about new beginnings and like you, I’ve just started my own business so would love to celebrate with these delicious Beaumont Wines!
I would love to win this wine and share it with my friends. We always go away for together in October and I would love to take these wines along
I also have not had a great relationship with my mom but as soon as I became a parent it changed. Everything I didn’t understand became clear to me. I’m just grateful that I still have her in my life still. Great post!
Lovely to read this Juwayra – it’s amazing how much motherhood changes everything!
Spring is for bubbles and snacks in the sun, picnicking with friends!
I love this range for my skin which is very sensitive – didn’t know they did baby goodies too!
However, having a baby has also taught me something surprising about writing and drama. Writing With a Baby . Your characters are your babies , and I’m realizing that having a child of your own helps you become a better parent to your characters. Watching her in action has taught me to swallow my pride and just ask for what I need. Then, all of a sudden my screen went blank. My little baby girl had hit the power button and shut my computer down.
Strawberry yogurt you say? Hmm, must give it a try!
I love Charles Fox Bubbly and their tasting room is stunning!
Agree whole heartedly.Mutual respect and kindness, some great wine and wonderful chocolate and the ability to laugh and not sweat the small stuff. Year 24 is a breeze and looking forward to the great anniversary present in year 25!
A sense of humour is so important!
Congratulations on almost 25 years 🙂
Okay, I need you to send me a voice note that clearly depicts how we say “forehead” – because I had no idea we say it differently?! (May have tried to say it out loud like a seal. Still not getting it. HELP.)
I have just sent you my best seal impression…..
forrid 🙂
Andrew you legend!
Se manifique! Love the photo journal and descriptions. brilliant gift ideas,
Thank you so much!
Me and my mom-in-law are huge fans of rose! Which ones of the above are cheap(ish) and affordable?
Ooooo I will master macaron making with you?
How about you make and I eat…lol
Cute man!
This! Wow, so many feels going on. I can relate to a lot of what you wrote. Thank you. Sharing the heck out of this!
Thank you so much Kim – I truly appreciate hearing that from you. x
Shante… feeling your pain. Thanks for a real raw and honest post. We all have similar battles. Sometimes we need to hear another’s story to gain perspective on own journeys. Xoxo
Thanks love – I feel, especially after the response to this post, that we often think we are entirely alone and that our problems are only ours
Wow! This amount of honesty takes a lot of courage. What a journey. Kudos to you strong lady.
Much appreciated! It took some time to form but the words were better out than in. xx
It takes great risk and courage to share about anything that is personal to oneself…But more importantly, it takes extraudinary belief in oneself to be courageous…in risking…
We are so very proud of you Shante..so grateful to God for his continuos work in your life and take great joy in seeing you become more and more the woman after Gods own heart..
Our own lives have been blessed beyond measure by you…and we are challenged by the deepening of your faith in God..
.You and your siblings are our treasure and immense joy…and there is no doubt in my mind that your brother, Jhordan salutes you
Dad
Thank you Pa – love you immensely
A great read, and I am sure a lot of people’s truth…definitely mine. Thank you.
I’m so grateful to read that Gayle – I hope the path that we are both on becomes less dark
You just made my life. I am going to have a glass of Pinotage right now!
This resonated deeply with me, haha. I have SUCH a sweet tooth. In January I decided to quit store-bought chocolate, and ever since then I’ve been stocking up on the vegan bounty bars from Thank Goodness at the Oranjezicht Market each week. They are absolutely delicious and just one curbs all my cravings. Plus, knowing that they’re full of coconut and selenium makes me feel better about the fact that they have a little cacao and agave in them 😉 Unfortunately they’re pretty pricey but I eat less and have totally noticed a change in my energy levels (for the better). Good health is worth a bit extra cash, right?
I need to get myself to the market! I love Bounty bars so do they have a similar taste? (just minus all the nonsense).
I agree with you, If I spend more, I’m inclined to make the food last longer and not just mindlessly binge
You are an AMAZING friend!! Glad to have you………
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Thank you my darling. xxx
This is so great! Being able to honestly share and support other moms in this journey is vital to crushing the MG x
Thanks so much Kimberley – it’s always far too easy to see the flaws than the positives
Sad thing is, I spent a better part of the day thinking of things I do well as a mom and most times there was direct evidence of the opposite. I salute the mom’s that really do rock motherhood. For me most times it’s a symphony of noise with perhaps a single note coming through clearly.
This is not a bid for your sympathy vote, but a view to the reality of trying to parent well and not knowing what you’re actually doing.
Hi Karin, thank you so much for sharing. I don’t think anyone knows what they ate doing…half of the time I’m relying on instinct and green tea. In 20 years time, I might be able to look back at what I’ve done and truly be at peace
Oh Wow! I needed to hear THIS today! Been having a rough few weeks where it’s all about mommy and no one else. And I too have felt frustrated, irritated and annoyed. But I’m taking your hubby’s words now too: She is showing me how much she loves me in the only ways she knows how. Thank you for sharing!
So lovely to read this – it’s true, they love us so uniquely! We all need reassurance and I’m so glad Mr H said that to me because I’m hugging Rosie so much more….she’s probably getting irritated with me!
This is such a beautiful post! Well done momma achieving 365 days!
Thank you so much lovely!! x
It’s the most amazing thing in the world, the way your child looks at you when she is holding onto your leg 🙂
Such a picturesque little town. I’d love to visit during one of their food festivals.
I really loved ambling around the town – some really beautiful places
I’m sometimes guilty of this without realising it.
I know! I find myself doing it all the time
I flew with my children a lot when they were small. Twice from Texas to SA with a 1 & 3 YO without husband ? (fortunately my parents were nearby) Once to Australia with 3&5 YO alone. It’s not so bad though. Quite do-able if you’re prepared. I wrote a few tips in an article here if it helps: https://missmelissawrites.com/2015/11/29/flying-with-children/
Have a great time !!
Oh my goodness Melissa, two kids! Thank you so much for sharing the link, I’m sitting with the post now, and a notepad! xx
Oooh good luck on that flight! But how amazing…what a trip you have planned. Can’t wait to see all the pics.
Thank you so much my love!
I’d pick:
1. C (er, bubbly, no brainer)
2. A
3. C
4. B
5. B
6.B
Okay, if I was wearing elasticated pants then I’d choose 1b 2c 3a 4c 5b 6c
Bookmarking this post for ideas for future! I’ve said to myself that I need to be doing more adventurous stuff – instead of visiting old favourites, so this is perfectly timed!
Whoohoo!
Eating out in England is SO expensive so I’m going to have to go a bit nuts when I come home
Never heard of them before but the Shiraz sounds superb!
The Bizoe Estalet is the best Shiraz i have taken thus far. Pairs well with a rare Rib Eye Steak.
Interesting – sorry you had to go through that drama of the VISA.
It was such a mission!
I loved this post and your pictures are simply gorgeous! So sorry you had to deal with a few difficult situations over there – a lost passport would have pushed me to my limits in no time!
Thank you so much Mariska! x
This is hilarious by the way! This bit I can actually picture: “If another parent falls out of their car in their pjs, I swiftly push them back into the vehicle and hold the door closed until they relent and drive back home to change”.
Merci buckets gorgeous one!
What a lovely post. I look forward to hitting Stellenbosch with you on Sunday for my photo’s.
I’m hoping it doesn’t rain for us!
I am so sorry for your loss and what you are going through. I have sadly been through a miscarriage too and I could really relate to everything you wrote. Sending lots and lots of love and thank you for sharing with us xxx
Thank you so much Mariska, and I’m so sorry for your loss. I thought about not sharing, but I’m not ashamed of it, I think, if people can be open about it, then it’s a glorious way to heal. Thank you for sharing your past with me. x
Oh Shantè I am so very sorry for your loss. I too have experienced a very early miscarriage(My very first pregnancy) but did go on to have 3 very healthy full term ones and had to believe that there was a greater reason for not being able to meet my first baby. You may never know what it is but know that it most certainly is not your fault.
Thank you Celeste. I’m holding fast to the that faith and that plan, knowing that ultimately there is a purpose for everything and if and when the next one comes, I’ll be just ever more grateful. xx
Thank you so much for sharing and I am so sorry for your loss. Thinking of you. We in the still trying for number 1 phase so totally with you on the whole waiting period..the ovulation ..the maybe I am the maybe I am not…but we keep trying and believe the right time will come! Sending you Lots of strength…:-)
Thank you for your comment Olivia. Man, the trying period is so tough, and can be super stressful. The waiting game is what gets to me the most and the inability to share your news until you’re out of the danger zone of 13 weeks. I wish you all the best and hope to see a bump soon!
So sorry to hear Shante. Don’t have any helpful advice to give so will just leave it at that. x
Thanks Belinda. x
This is great! Nursery Rhymes are a great way to introduce reading and I know kiddos are going to love this unit. Thanks for sharing!
Great post. Lol, I just left the whole car registration/licensing deal to Mr B too. I seriously have no brain capacity for that either.
There are just some things I cannot do….or don’t want to do. Hehehe
We also roasted a chicken in ours and it was super delicious – impressed!
I’m keen to try a dessert next, something deeply chocolatey!
Oh my goodness, these leggings look AMAZING!!!! I fully agree with you: rather fork out a little bit more and get a decent pair of leggings instead of, as you mentioned, buying a new inexpensive pair every two months. It adds up pretty quickly. I am definitely going to spoil myself with a pair as well!
It’s like good jeans, I do pay more because I know they will hold their shape – and now that I live in leggings more, it makes sense to invest in them
You are so right: empathy really is a gift. From harsh experience the last four years I came to realise that most people really have NO idea how to sympathise without somehow turning the focus on themselves. I think traumatic situations make people very uncomfortable as they are not skilled in what to say/not say and then the first thing they offer is unsolicited advice. Most of the time with good intentions of course, but it irks me every single time. That’s why I made it an absolute mission to learn how to sympathise and emphasise correctly. It is literally always better to say as little as possible and avoid saying things that could hurt this person that is already down and out while trying to hold it together. Sadly this doesn’t seem to be quite as common/default as it should be and I totally understand your frustration with it.
I am really sending you lots of love/hugs, I am thinking of you and I hope you will have a good break over the holidays.
xx
I’m so sorry for your loss Shante. I don’t know your personally, nor have I experienced the loss of losing a baby but I can sympathize with you as a women and a mom who knows all too well how excited we get from the moment we see that faint line on a stick. The loss has to be the hardest and I pray you find peace day by day. I salute you for Sharing your story so bravely xxxx
Thank you so much for your kind words Leigh, I truly appreciate them. xxx
Thank you for the mention, lovely lady 🙂 There are so many great SA blogs out there that I had no idea about until the Instastorie game. I love this iniative, so thank you … again… lol
Some of my very favourite humans and blogs on this list ❤️ Prepare to fall in love with the writers, their writing and their stories. These are some of the most important and influential people in my life x
You’re one of my favourite humans!
? thank you lovely xx
I’ve also noticed how the same bloggers promote the same products/brands on social media. This probably means that PR companies only notice/use these bloggers for their campaigns. It might be because of following or whatever but I’m glad you brought the topic up. There are so many bloggers that I never knew about who I discovered through the insta story game.
Great post!
Thanks so much for this Shante! I think it’s pretty amazing what you’re doing. x
Grat post. You always hit the nail on the head.
Apparently, I forgot how to spell over the holidays.
Hahaha. You’ve made me chuckle!
lol, glad I managed to make you laugh.
Ha ha…This made me chuckle too, because initially I missed the typo!
I literally got goose bumps as I read this, thank you for sharing the sentiments of so many. I’ve been seeing so much of this and you’ve really just written it all in such a nice way. Thanks for listing my blog. Your blog is awesome by the way, going to do some reading tonight with a lovely glass of wine 🙂
Thank you so much for the compliment but most of all, thank you for sharing your voice
Hi Tracy
Thanks for sharing this post on the SA Blogger Facebook page, which is how I came across it and happily so, stumbled upon this blog for the first time too 🙂
Love your sentiments. More needs to be done.
Please can you add : Real Life Mum
http://www.reallifemumsite.wordpress.com
Yay for this post 🙂
Thank you so much for writing this post! More people in PR need to be aware that:
a) POC bloggers exist
b) We put in just as much (or more!) effort as our white counterparts
c) They’re missing out on a very huge audience!
Parenting blogs isn’t my niche but I’m so happy that you’ve included so many POC bloggers! Well done!
– Munira
Really great post and you are such an amazing person for writing this post. ?
Great bloggers on this list, people who keep it real!
Such a great post with a truly worthwhile intent. Thank you for creating such awareness, as well as for the mention.?
I love this post and I think it is apt as I have personally felt that there are many preferences, whilst I think it is ok to have preferences, I don’t think it should be dependent on the colour of our skin. You have so eloquently expressed a sensitive reality which I am sure not many would be brave enough to do, I applaud you for this. It certainly is food for thought. Thank you for including my blog on the list.
I think your goals are absolutely realistic and as long as you have that change of paradigm, you will achieve it, just keep reminding yourself. I also feel that it is great that you’ve posted about it – it sort of creates some sort of accountability – like what if..some of your readers follow up to see how you are doing? If you know what I mean…
I wish you all the best in achieving your goals and more this year 🙂
It’s so cute, I can also see it being part of stationery – for the desk, I am sure kids will love it as well. For those people who enjoy having little ornaments in their cars…can see it working there too. I love the personalised touch.
As a blogger of colour, I follow mostly other bloggers of colour and can agree. There are many POC bloggers with big/decent-sized followings that make great content and actually influence their followers. I come across more each and every day, and I don’t mean newbies but established bloggers that I haven’t heard about before because I didn’t step outside my normal reading (I follow quite a few on your list already, but will check the ones I don’t know out). I agree brands are definitely losing out on huge markets by putting themselves in a pigeon-hole.
Let’s hope in 2018 brands will be more inclusive with their online campaigns.
My little blog is over at http://www.osoinspired.com, I blog about beauty, lifestyle and fitness. I’d love it if you check it out and add it to your list.
Thank you so much for your comment. I definitely think it’s about us sharing the word, and doing our research!
Excellent post. Thank you for touching on this issue. I hope that the blogger circle does grow and become more ‘colourful’.
This post also prompted me to get back into nurturing my ‘ baby’, http://www.glamhipsterdiaries.com. Consistency has been my biggest struggle over the last few months.
Thank you so much for sharing hun
Thanks for sharing. I’ve discovered new readings from this post and I’m most definitely permanently adding ‘through my wine glass’ to my reading list. We really should support each other more as bloggers whether a beginner or a seasoned blogger.
I love your thinking!
Such a great post. It’s easy for us to feel like we’re really never going to get anywhere, be as successful as our favourite fairer skinned bloggers, but posts like this give me hope…for everybody <3
Thank you for including me on the list <3 I will definitely be adding some of these blogs to my list!
Great post! Thanks for touching on this issue. I’d love to be added to your list. My blog is about travel in South Africa and beyond.
https://inafricaandbeyond.com
It is too hot to write a proper comment, but loved this post and love your face.
I love you
Loved this 🙂
Thanks Melisaa. x
Girl, start a war man, start a friggen war! lol Only kidding.
Look, I must admit, I bite my tongue A LOT because I’d hate to have a large group of people not like me. But like, this is 2018 and it’s time to keep it REAL.
Is there an elite group of bloggers? Uhh, yes. Are they are all white? Uhhh, yes for the most part. Have I ever felt personally victimised by Regina George? Definitely! (Added that last one for nostalgia).
I don’t own a DSLR camera (4 kids, and all that) and I dont spend my pocket money on blog redesigns (4 kids… like I said)… Do I blame it on white privilege and the fact that I want my farm back? No. But I sure do love saying stuff… and I love that I have a blog to say stuff on. So say it I will.
I probably wont get all the campaigns, but thats okay. Coz, hey, a brand is a business and maybe the “business” wants to work with a blog that looks like a magazine, and mine looks like an old Readers Digest that someone used to prop the backdoor open with. Okay. That’s fine. But how about we all start being a little bit more aware of each other? Maybe that will help to ease the current discomfort. (and yes, if you’re still sitting there going “huh? what discomfort” then you need to reread yesterdays post). (p.s. I think that flat lays are from the devil) (Im kidding guys)
Thank you for being brave enough to say things that other people arent!
Damn girl, I love your writing so much! Please get your farm back, I would like to visit. Thanks
Your writing! Wow! Love this comment!!! especially the ‘and yes, if you’re still sitting there going “huh? what discomfort” then you need to reread yesterdays post’ hahahaha! and the flatlays part, because they really are the devil, I spend hours doing the dam things, but 5 seconds to do a candid shot of my lil gremlin! Why flaytlays, why do you choose to torment me! xx
Beautiful read. Thank you for sharing these sentiments in an elegant but impactful read.
My blog is a lifestyle blog focusing on healthy vegan recipes and raising empowered children.
http://lifesatreat.co.za/
Thank you so much for sharing!
LOL…this is still so relevant even though I’m late to the party with my years later comment! HA HA
I thought I was the only one seeing this. It’s so discouraging to enter a market where you don’t even know whether you will be valued or not. Hopefully this will change and we will start seeing more POC working with brands.
I just started a Beauty, Hair and Lifestyle blog a few months back
Prettypalesa.co.za
I read the teepee example in your post, but in no way thought you were attacking any teepee making company. Amazing what some people focus on and the messages they take away from the very same article…..just interpreted so differently.
I also never read anything about disregarding the work and more so, the hard work that white people put into their blogs.
My initial comment on the first post was that it becomes unsettling and sad to wonder if you’ll ever get a break. If your work will ever speak for itself. And to sometimes think that break won’t come because of the colour of my skin…..it’s hard, but many of us keep going. A lot of the bloggers in your previous post have been blogging for years…they are putting the work in…but for some, the break will never come. I removed my comment though, because I didn’t want to offend anybody.
Another lovely post, so well written. And a secret coloured….who knew??? lol. Thanks for sharing some insight into your life as well.
Shante, you are the best! Thank you for being brave enough to just say these things! And the secret coloured part, wow, who would have thought, my Grandfather was a Cape Malay, and when my very white granny fell in love with him, she was disowned by her family. People suck, but they can suck less if they are just open to having conversations!
Have the best day!
x
I love this – thank you for including me in the list, and wow – there are so many bloggers on here that I wasn’t already following. So much has already taken place in terms of supporting each other in just the last 24hours since this post went live. It’s amazing. YAY for bringing this to everyones attention and for making the circle bigger!!! xxx
I’m all for diversity and breaking barriers. I know of a big South African blogger who has a really big audience, but can’t get paid because he posts content that has been labeled as “too edgy”. His audience clearly doesn’t find offence in his content, yet brands don’t want to work with him because of ideological bias. That’s also a horrid form of exclusion.
But we have to remember that your audience size, and who is in your audience matters. If I look at the comments here and follow the links, it becomes pretty clear that this is a group if bloggers that all engage with each other’s content. But where are the outsider, the non-bloggers, the ones who are not commenting just so that they can link back to their own blog?
I’m a POC, but I don’t know all that many POC bloggers that actually have a big audience outside of the blogger circles they run in. What is our POC-audience worth, if only bloggers know other blogs, but they average guy or girl on the street doesn’t know any of those blogs?
I think we all as bloggers have to start being honest about who our audience really is. Because at the moment we are lying about our audience to each other and to ourselves.
Ruan, is that you? 😛
j/k – but what’s your blog address? Don’t see it as part of your comment and would love to see what your blog is like.
I think parenting blogs are a bit of a different kind of tribe. We might all engage with each other’s content, but that’s also because we’re interested in many similar things, like what to feed our kids or how to wean or how to lose baby weight or deal with people trying to judge us for our parenting styles. So yes, there might be a bit of a circle jerk tendency of all reading and commenting on each other’s blogs, but that’s because we’re more than /just/ bloggers.
From Shante’s father
What my daughter didn’t mention is that although her dad, that’s me comes from the Transkei, he, that means me, came from 10 different nationalities…including from two extremes; Xhosa and we were neighbours to Nelson Mandela…how’s that for name dropping, not that any one remembers…except me when I am depressed and instead of test driving a Mercedes or an Audi or a BMW, I name drop the Xhosa thingy…neither works mind you…and Portuguese…Oh and talking about Portuguese, my great and I mean very great grandfather was a prisoner of a Portuguese ship that was shipwrecked off the Port St John’s coast…Am I famous or what…
On with the story…Most people would be excited coming from 10 different nationalities, but, not me…You see, when the then Apartheid Government introduced the Nationalization Act way back when, and many folks will remember that Act, one of the most divisive, derogatory, dehumanizing and debilitating acts ever to be introduced by supposedly humans…my family and millions of colured families were completely and utterly divided and segregated…by an act that decided who was what because of their colour and hair type and where that what should live…
Because of being of different nationalities, the then Apartheid Government, could not decide which race camp my family should or could belong to, my dad, and he looked like Anthony Quinn the Actor…was declared unclassified….yep you guessed it, he was a non anything…So what did that mean, each of his kids, that’s the four siblings, were non classified…How’s that for an identity crises.??
Every day I wished that I was either white or black or even Indian, at least I would be someone…But, as time went on, and as God became real to me…mind you it took him quite a while to get thru to me, cos I had tried just about everything to discredit him, and many white Christians, to my shame, will tell you how much they suffered and crumbled at my arguments that God did not exist and my treatment of them…On a wonderful, some of them are my closest friends to this day and i am blessed to have them in my life.
Moving on…I decided to leave South Africa because I did not want to fall in love with some beautiful women only to find out that she was my cousin, as that had happened a couple of times…just one of the consequences of the Nationality Act…So off to the UK I went, for surely, I would find a women who was not related to me…I found her – a blond white from somewhere near London…and married her
Upon hearing that Emma was pregnant, I was ecstatic, and could not wait to see our child…Shante was our first born – maybe you might like to ask her why we named her Shante??? Now you would have thought, being off colour, our daughter would have at least some or one off the ten nationalities in her…but not a chance…a total blond curly child…a real Shirley Temple….
I hoped that as the days went by, this little blond thing would get darker…but God was not listening to me..he was looking at a much bigger picture….All four of our kids were white…but each with very noticeable and distinguishing features from the Ten Nationalities from me…Listen to Shante sing and you will hear a Whitney Houston and a Aretha Franklin voice…not to mention her justice and don’t suffer fools gladly attitude…gifts from her father…But look at her gift with words and creativity and you will see her mom…
Ok i thought, they not like me in colour, but lets hope they marry a black person cos that way i would at least have dark grandchildren…God is still not listening to me..and i am so glad he isn’t…os i would just mess things up terribly if i had my own way…Now we have a gorgeous granddaughter who we love so very much…But she could get dark later on…hehehehe
I have over time, come to realize that nothing in our lives is arbitrary. It’s all for a purpose and most amazingly, God decided how you would be born. Regardless of the circumstances of our birth or who our parents are, God had a plan in creating us.
It doesn’t matter whether our parents were good, bad, or indifferent. God knew that those two individuals possessed exactly the right DNA genetic makeup to create the custom “you” he had in mind.
Yes, I am aware that some of us might wish that we had different set of parents, “how could God have chosen them”?, you may well ask!
Maybe my own kids ask that, all I can do is make sure that they learn to feel loved, accepted and believed in, so that they never ask that question but become proud of the choice of parents that God had for them.
But, it’s not just down to me, I must and want to credit Shante’s extraordinary mother – Emma, my amazing wife, for the incredible balance and dept of purpose she brings to each of the kids…the way she enables each to know how special they are in a world that might take umbrage coming from a man of Ten different nationalities…
To each of my kids…see what you are meant to be and pursue that with all your hearts…but in doing so, always be mindful of others who would do with helping hand in reaching for their dreams in a world that will always try to hold them back because of what they light look like or what they might be or from where they come from….So whatever you choose kids, choose well
We could never be more proud of our daughter Shante…for all that she has become – never love her husband, Brett more – for al that he means to Shante and never be more grateful to God for our extraordinary granddaughter, Lily Rose, whom we just adore….Last but not least, never be more thankful and humbled for the incredible gifts in the lives of our other children, Jhordan, Rohan and Adehles – all precious in the sight of our Heavenly Father
And now we know where Shante got her beautiful way with words and people 🙂
Thank you so much for this post! It does give you something to think about. I am a blogger too.
Thank you for this post, my fiancé and I have a lifestyle blog, we feature travel, beauty and restaurant reviews – http://www.meletso.com
I would LOVE to start taking pictures with an amazing DSLR but unfortunately it hasn’t reached my budget as yet!! Thanks for writing this post and clearing things up, Shante.
Great read…you make some valid points and I also believe if we all (South Africans) would just support each other more, regardless of background, this country will soar! I am not a Lifefstyle blogger and clearly I am not a mommy blogger, but I think the principle of your article rings true across the board.
Thanks so much Jurie – I am 100% with you! I found starting my blog to be so difficult because it can be so cliquey. We forget that by empowering others, we do the very same for ourselves!
Love this! Always get frustrated when I’d go to events in Joburg and it was mainly white, affluent mommy bloggers with maybe one or two PoC. Thanks for writing this and hope it’s a useful resource for people looking to find more awesome bloggers to follow – I’m already a huge fan of many people on this list. <3
Great post. Last year I experienced racism from a well known brand where they indirectly told me that they can’t work with me because of the colour of my skin…reading your post gives me hope. Im glad that others are also noticing what is happening and I really hope that things change this year. I would love to be added to your list I am a beauty blogger.
https://aobmblog.wordpress.com/
Oh my goodness Bianca, I’m so sorry to hear that! Thank you so much for sharing on this post
Wow!!! Beautiful photography and Cindy is just the most amazing person. Wow!
Thank you lovely! Isn’t Cindy just…WOW
I actually cannot breathe… Cindy, you are beautiful. Shante, you are amazing… wow!
This, is just breathtaking. Cindy, I hope you read this and know that all that lives inside of you, shone our through these pictures. Not just the beautiful make up and gorgeous dress, or even the magical flower crown, the love for you family and the struggles and the kindness and the hope, all those things are so visible in these pics. Well done Shante, gosh what a great shoot. xxx
Thank you so much Debs!
Cindy is the most beautiful person that I cyber stalk! Her hair, her body and her face! Even when she isn’t wearing make up I think she is so so pretty! And as a person, and a mother, and a wife…. well I would love to be even half as awesome as she is 🙂 These pics are so incredible I just can’t choose my favourite!
She really is a beautiful rose!
Such a beautiful concept and amazing pictures!! Well done to you all!
Thank you so much Kathryn!
AMAZING!
Whoohoo!
Oh Shanté. You captured this so beautifully. Well done to you and Our gorgeous Cindy for this xxx
Thank you my darling
Absolutely stunning Cindy, you look beautiful with and without make up. I can relate completely I have not gone a day facing public without base on since I was around 13. I too will not even take a delivery until I’m made up with my mask and I totally relate to feeling good when it looks good and bad and Moody when it doesn’t. Well done kn being transparent about it all and inspiring others like me x
Thank you so much for sharing your thorns Tamsyn – I believe it can be quite liberating to realize we are not alone in our darkness
Sublime! Amazing effort you powerful and talented woman/women!
Ah thanks hun!
Powerful message. Awesome photographs of the beautiful Cindy. I can’t wait for the rest of the series.
Thank you Juwayra!
Wow…wow…wow! These pictures are EVERYTHING! I felt as if I was right there…this haunting sort of forest movie playing out.
Great article Shante and Cindy! I had the same issues with skin during my last pregnancy, but I’m realising it’s not as bad. My ‘thing’ though, would be my weight. It’s always made me feel as if it defines me and what people think of me….well they think nothing besides: Wow she’s fat. It has limited me from accepting social invitations, from wearing nice clothes. Always frumpy, hiding. Also I was a success story a few years ago and lost a lot of weight…all regained now. In 2017 I definitely tried to get rid of the shackles I had put on myself.
I’m not happy with my weight, but it doesn;t mean I’m not worthy of being a person and that I have to stop existing until I one day lose the weight…AGAIN….
Such a great article. It’s amazing whenever I see Cindy’s pictures I think, what a stunning woman…that hair! Those cute kids! It was only when she opened up about her skin I realised…wow…we all have our demons I guess.
Thank you so much Simone for the compliments and for sharing your thorns!
Cindy radiates beauty from her soul
Wow ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Amazingly beautiful and I have absolutely no words as to how you captured this. I’m speechless at the beauty of it.
<3 <3
LOVE LOVE LOVE my friend!!! So important in today’s world for Woman to realise that there is no Perfect!!!
And Cindy well you are BEAUTIFUL!!!!
Cant wait to see more…….
Thank you so much love!
Interesting post – Cindy, thank you for sharing. Good work Shante.
Your incredible pictures took my breath away! Like literally! I immediately switched to my laptop as these pictures are way too gorgeous to look at on a tiny mobile device. You are an incredibly, insanely talented photographer and Cindy is the most gorgeous model! I am still speechless! Cannot wait for for the rest of the series.
I can not fault you in what you have said those bloggers you have mentioned never mind a few others are respected in the blogging community and the bonus is they are super fabulous people. Great insight and so much truth excuse me while I go read the follow up
Great post and thank you for the mention Shante.
Let’s hope to see some more diversity in campaigns this year!
This shoot is stunning! WOW and Cindy – you are GORGEOUS!
Cindy you are so beautiful and helping so many other women by openly sharing your story. Shante, everything about this is just exquisite!
Thank you for a great list of bloggers. Always good to find peeps material to read.
Wow what a beautiful story and what a strong women.Love it
Thank you Sandra <3
Oh my goodness me. I’m freaking sobbing at this incredible shoot! Thank you Shante for giving me the space to speak my truth and thank you for capturing this incredible photos. I loved working with you and Tam and I am so proud to be a part of this series. BLOWN AWAY <3
This series is absolutely gorgeous and awe inspiring
I’ve always admired Jonelle for her strength. These images are beautiful and captures that inner strength brilliantly.
All the love! xx
WOW Cindy you are looking gorgeous here! I have to admit the photographer really knows her stuff!
Another incredible story from one of the strongest women I know. Absolutely breathtaking!
Thank you Cindy! <3
My Amazonian warrior princess friend who inspires me daily. Beautiful photos S xxx
All the love!
It’s weird that these comments are about me, when you’re in it, you don’t feel strong, you feel weak and helpless and then you get through it somehow and people see you as strong and it’s a weird feeling. Like what did I do to deserve these comments and for people to think this about me. Thank you so much everyone <3
In awe!! Just wow.
Oh wow! Lovely post and absolutely stunning pics of my beautiful, super strong and brave daughter. Love this. ♡♡♡
She really is a wonder
Wow, awe-inspiring story and photos. Jonelle, you look like a goddess. What incredible photography and powerful story!
It was an absolute pleasure to do
Wow, what a journey! Your strength is admirable Jonelle.
Shante, you are amazing with your camera.
And everyone else who played a part in the project, stunning, stunning, stunning!
Thank you so much Juwayra! X
Thank you so, so much!
Brilliant series! The pictures are stunning.
Jonelle you are one heck of an amazing human.
Thank you Celeste!! <3 <3 <3
Thank you for this series. It’s very inspiring.
Cindy you are gorgeous!
Thank you Celeste
Forever an inspiration Jonelle! X
Incredible shoot. I agree with Mandy-Lee, you’re a warrior princess. Shante, this post breeds excellence.
Thank you Melissa!
Thank you so much love!! X
Amazing to read your story Jonelle and see and hear your strength. x
Thank you Belinda! <3
Once again I am completely blown away! WOW! Just WOW!
Maz, you are one of the most incredible people I know and one of the people I will miss most when we leave here!
xoxo
Can we please not talk about you leaving? lol
These photos and this beautiful beautiful woman are breathtaking. There is magic in your voice Maz, you will continue to change the world wherever you touch it. And Shante, your incredible gift to capture the soul of these beautiful women is phenomenal. Well done for an incredible series x
Thank you lovely!
Thanks Mands!
Holy cow! I felt empowered reading this Maz. You’re amazing and beautiful and this piece showcased that. Shante, what gorgeous images and I totally got your vision. Loved the red against the black. Gorgeous photos!!
Thank you Kim!
Thank you Kim, I don’t think anyone has ever told me that I made them feel empowered… what an incredible compliment
My mind cannot even handle how absolutely BEAUTIFUL you are Maz! I loved reading and I’m loving this series.
Shante – you are amazing, these pictures are gorgeous.
Thank you so much Lindsay – I think her personality and “darkness” really came alive in this shoot
Shante is such a visionary. Thank you for all your love and always being willing to share it
BREATHTAKING! Everything about it!
Strong, brave and breath takingly beautiful!! Proud of you Maz xxx
Thank you, Leigh!
WOW, absolutely stunning, so incredibly brave and beautiful
Hi Shante. I love your work. Maz’s story is captured beautifully in your images. Exquisite!!
Thank you so much Stephen!
Incredibly courageous of you, Maz , to be so open and honest in a public forum – especially in view of your vulnerability to bullying. Brave, brave woman! I salute you – and Shante for the images and providing safe platform to speak out. Respect to you both.
This was very moving and dramatic. Also very revealing. From an acquaintance point of view, I had no idea Maz’s personality and character ran so deep. Beautiful story and beautiful work Shante and team for peeling back these layers and giving us insight into some truly extraordinary women!
I enjoyed reading your story, especially on how you educate your kids. Thank you Maz for being an inspiration.
Thank you for allowing me to be part of this. You inspire me.
Beautiful and amazing story and the way it was captured
“I have to apologize to them more times than I care to admit.”
I have written those words more than once. I totally identify with your writing.
Maz you are such an inspiration and a truly beautiful soul. Thank you for sharing your story.
Shante, you are incredible. You have captured the essence of Maz’s story beautifully. Your pictures really tells a thousand words. Truly talented woman.
I am always at such a loss for words after reading these posts, they are so raw AND beautiful at the same time.
I have also really enjoyed getting to know some of my old favourite and new favourite bloggers stories and what brought them to where they are today.
You are a vision in these images and your story made me cry but I am not going to give you pity, that is not what you want, so I am going to say that you are a beautiful, strong and powerful woman with a special talent to bring out all the feels with your words.
This is just incredible, and so are you.
This series has been one of my favourite things I have ever seen on a blog.
Kerry, thank you. It’s been an incredible journey and putting it into writing has just exposed so many silly negativeness I had which just isn’t true. I just only hope the story can give hope where it is needed.
Beautiful Shante, your story touched me so deeply that I found it difficult not only to find words, but to actually find my voice. You told your story in such a delicate yet profound way and I’m in awe of you right now. Reading your story, your pain and then how the birth of your daughter opened your heart to this incredible love again is wonderful. And isn’t it amazing how the opening of your womb caused an opening of the heart! Like a flower you have opened and become even more beautiful than you already were.
I also lost my brother 34 years ago. I was 23 and he was 26 and because we were the last two of 8 kids, we were very close. So one sunny morning 34 years ago, I kissed him goodbye as I dropped him at work, not knowing that as I watched him walk away I would never see him again. For many years I would search for him on a crowded street or shop or anywhere thinking, it was just a mistake and that he was alive somewhere and I suppose that was how I coped.
So thank you for your story, we all need to be reminded of how God, in His infinite wisdom can bring us out of darkness and into His beautiful light.
Never forget how strong, courageous and breathtaking beautiful you are.
love n blessings
Connie
As children and now as adults, I have and will continue to always admire both your strength and courage. The first time I heard this tale, I didn’t know how to react, well as a teenager who does? Now as an adult I still don’t have the right words, other than love and admiration for you and your whole family.
So, that made me cry. I just think back to how awful I acted in so many situations, but I’m so grateful for your love, and for your friendship when it all felt like too much. Thank you Clare
This speaks to me in such a profound way. Death has been such a big part of my life. My cousin, who was more like my brother was killed at 13. He was riding a motorbike and a truck knocked him down. His Death brought such suffering to my family. Not only did he die but a part of us too, for a long time our family was filled with ugly. My father introduced him to bikes and he felt responsible for the death. Your story has so much meaning to me. Thank you for bravely sharing it. ?
Thank you my friend. We sometimes forget how truly intertwined we are with death, how unforgiving he is, and how terrible it is to be “left behind”. Thank you for sharing with me my precious – the beauty is that the cracks that break us, make us so much more inviting, and loving
Shante every post is in this series is moving. Your commitment dedication and bravery is remarkable. Your strength is an inspiration. I hope more people will read this and find comfort in knowing that there is indeed a light at the end of the tunnel.
Thank you for your beautiful words Lindsay – it’s been an honor to create something that has had such a profound affect on so many people.
My husband’s sister and brother died. She when she was 2 years and him a few days before his 16th birthday. Every day is hard for him, more so because our eldest child is a copy/paste of his brother. Your story brought me to tears and reminded me of how far my husband, and his parents, have come in the years following their deaths. Thank you for this ?
I am so sorry to read that Kim – death is such an awful cloak to wear, robbing us of so much. I’m so glad that they are slowly taking the burdens off
Oh my goodness I have no words this is breathtaking. Maz – warrior woman- you stand for so much that is good with the world. Thank you for being so brave and true. Much love
Breathtaking! Thank you for sharing!
Thank you Luchae!
Once again the stunning photography left me breathless! You are angelically beautiful. Thank you for sharing and trusting your story with us.
Thank you Mariska, thank you for following the journey
OH MY GOSH, this was sad but beautiful and you are beautiful and wise and lovely
My heart is full.
You are too kind Abieda – thank you for the love!
These photos of you are exceptional and tell the story without the words. Your words are always so true and clear and pierce through any emotional distance we place between ourselves and other people’s pain. You may not have intended to be part of this series, but I believe this series was born of the need for you to share this here and allow you to see yourself as the exquisitely beautiful, strong and talented woman we all see. Sending you love x
Your words are just so perfect – thank you for reading and sharing in the journey…and most of all, for your constant love and support
I love this series! I’m so glad you finally gave in, and decided to feature yourself – thank you for sharing your story. You’re so strong! And the photos are gorgeous! You look stunning! ❤️
Ah thank you Charlene! It’s been an absolute honour to just let everything go, and to give space for others to do the same
Shante, I don’t actually even have any words. Death too has touched me a number of times with its cold hand in my adult life, but most recently with my own Father. An incomplete story was ours before he died nearly 6 years ago and so suddenly, and there was no chance for words of forgiveness between us and never will be. I’m sorry for your loss and experiences when you should have been carefree and dancing through your childhood, but I am grateful that you have experienced your healing. This post has been a huge trigger for me, but I really needed to read it.
Celeste, I’m so sorry to read about the death of your father. There are no words I can offer that would bring any comfort, just know that by sharing this, your heart can become cherished by someone else, someone who wills for you to heal
Absolutely breathtaking, raw and beautiful!!!
Dearest Shante, it took ne also years to own myself. Now i only tell things as they are, feel things as they are. Im in love with this post. I’m in love with this you.
Thank you so much Ingrid! xx
Am amazing journey Shante.
So happy for you that God brought you out and blessed you with gorgeous Rosie.
Thank you Chalice!
I have just discovered your series… Thank you for your courage on sharing such a personal part of yourself. I am in awe…. This touched me very deeply ❤️
I’m so glad you found it – I’m so glad it resonated with you. Thank you for reading
Your story is heartbreaking but also quite remarkable!
I just wanted to say one thing….. don’t ever confuse pity with compassion. I made that mistake during my 7 year journey through infertility and recurrent pregnancy loss. I cut myself off from everyone because I hated their pity, which made me feel small and uncomfortable. It took me a long time to realize that because of my own insecurities and not feeling good enough, I saw pity when in actual fact it was love and compassion that I was rejecting and turning away from.
xxx
Thank you so much Sharon. It is true, pride has done me so many wrongs, it has closed so many doors that I will never be able to open again. It even turned me against my own mother when really, she knew me better than anyone else. xx
What an inspiring story from a beautiful women Thank you for opening up and may you and your family be blessed
Thank you Sandra!
Profound and deeply touched.
So thankful!
this entire series… I have no words, such beauty born from such pain and heartache, I cannot imagine, thank you for allowing people to read these stories and about the journeys that have made each of the 4 of you who you are today, incredible beauty.
Thank you Chastin for following the series, for following our journeys
This was such a raw and honest post. Thank you for sharing your story, Maz! And the photos are amazing – wow! Megan xxx
This post, this series, it is incredible. That there are those among us who conceal these amazing stories beneath layers upon layers of time and hurt – it just boggles my mind. That saying about being kind because we all have a story is more true than we can imagine.
I admire your strength, one I’m finding is a core of myself, too, in a place I thought was filled with weakness.
My heart breaks for your childhood loss, but what a gift the birth of your daughter must have been! I hope you share this with her when she is old enough to understand.
It is so true, we walk alongside people and we never know what they have faced or what we say or do that might affect them. Thank you so much for your lovely, supportive comments
The experience of death when you are very young can indeed colour the rest of your life, if you let it. I know. It sears the soul and must be used to gain strength. Shine like a pearl, love those close to you and grow. You are finding your way, let it be a happy path from now on, with the past just a memory. xxxx
Shante, wow, this has left me speechless. Your writing is so beautiful, your pictures are stunning. Everything about this article is just breath taking. What a tragedy you’ve been through, cannot imagine having to go through this, but you’ve made it and through all of it, you are still able to shine so brightly! Keep on shinning!
Oh thank you Tracy – I intend on being brighter than I ever thought possible, as long as I remember how far I’ve come.
This was hard to read, because I hold you so dear and the fact that you went through so much pain upsets me. That’s too much pain. You are incredible. You are strong. You are smart. You are loving, caring and loyal. You are fierce AF. And you are an amazing mom. I am so glad you decided to write your story as well. I want to write a more profound comment, but I am crying too much. lol
Thank you my love, thank you for your constant support
Shante, you are such a brave and strong woman. Thank you for sharing your story, so beautifully written.
Thank you beautiful!
So very beautiful – the words, the images, you. What an incredible series. Well done x
Thank you so much!
Loss for words. Thank you for sharing this.
<3
I read this with a lump in my throat. It’s so hard to read any of the stories in this series and not feel like it’s a personal part of who you are as a person, a story told through someone else’s words. If I had died from my ordeal, Oden would have lived without a mom and all the things you say you feel about your beautiful boy not having a dad, are things that played over and over in my mind, I can’t die because he needs a mom. I’m so truly deeply sorry for your loss. I can’t even begin to imagine the pain you’re going through but I can say that your son is so blessed to have a mother with your strength. WOW. I’m just blown away.
To the team, THANK YOU for making this possible. For sharing this story and our stories. I don’t have enough words to express how powerful this series is!
I had to stop after reading the first few lines. I wouldn’t want anyone at the office see me balling my eyes out. I will continue reading this later at home.
The photographs…ALWAYS gorgeous!
Wow!! So sad and yet so inspiring at the same time. My heart bleeds for you.
Ange, I can never read your mister’s name without my heart clenching. Every time you write about any of this, the feelings get more raw and powerful and that is your gift – you take your readers with you through all of it. Your blog is beautiful, it is a document of love for both your boys. These photos are everything as always Shante ❤️ And you totally caught the wicked sense of humour that is a hallmark of Angela’s being, and the haunting sadness just below the surface. Angie, you are exquisite my friend xx
What a heartbreaking story! The images are really powerful, hope they help Angela in finding her strength during hard times x
My heart….
It is incredible what we can live through. Oh Angela, I think we all clutch at ourselves at the thought of losing our spouses, but to actually experience it must be truly heartwrenching. Your strength for Elijah is amazing and admirable. I hope you have people who can support you the way you have supported him.
These images are so incredibly powerful… all of them. And this story… what a brave and strong woman. Her son is so lucky to have her as his mamma.
Thank you so much for sharing this. You are such an inspiration.
I can relate to this in so many ways. I met/literally faced death for the first time when I was a teenager. And faced it again when I lost my dad. I was already pregnant with my daughter when I had to say goodbye to my daddy. The walls that I have built in my life are bigger than enormous. Giving birth to my child changed me for the better in so many ways. I still have a long way to go.
Thanks for sharing! Sounds like the dream job!
Thanks so much Karen – it was truly lovely. I learnt so much
Reading your article made me miss the wine industry which I left to do accounting for the husbands company about 3 years ago. I loved it whilst I was in the middle of it and did find that the older – read more experienced hands – were always ready with some advice and help. The wine industry in South Africa is definietly a vibrant community and I am glad to see so many women entering the industry and making a success of it. Now that I am not in the wine industry anymore, I can say that I really don’t like Pinotage – sorry Pinotage guys and that I find Sauvignon Blanc too acidic – I always feel that it should still be either growing or sitting in some barrel somewhere instead of being in a bottle already. I do miss all the wine people –
I just love that there is so much freedom to enjoy what you like, once you realize that your own views matter. I am a fan of Pinotage but its a difficult beast to sell because it can be so wrong. I also loved how close everyone was and how you’re really all working towards one goal – global domination 😉
Lovely article. Except that part where you insult all Australian wines which are DELICIOUS! It’s so lovely reading about your journey into wine. Knowing who you are now, I’d have NEVER imagined a time when you didn’t love wine. Because wine is basically life. Oh and olives. Which I love too ;P
Hahaha, I do love Australian wines…but they have to be above a certain monetary amount because the cheapies they bring to England are very hot. I tried so hard to like olives because olive oil is gold, but I just can’t
Dear Shanté
Thank you so much for the kind words and special mention, we are truly honoured.
Kind regards
Diani
Only a pleasure Diani!
Ah, huge congratulations, Shante! What wonderful news!
Thank you so much Sigrid! xxx
Super congrats! And yeah, every pregnancy is different, although I found my boy pregnancies were similar and my girl one was different. Be kind to yourself and take it easy. The food cravings/aversions and the exhaustion are the worst for me too. Currently wishing I could sleep for days! Having a toddler and being pregnant isn’t a joke ( you’d think I’d learn my lesson… this is my 5th pregnancy and I’ve had toddlers with all but the first obviously!) Strengths to you and enjoy your trip to family!
5th! Wow, what a wonderfully big family. Wishing you lots of strength and energy 😉 xx
Congratulations! Happy to hear you are taking things easy, isn’t it just human nature to wish our days away instead of savouring the moments!
Thank you Alet! I’m so excited to meet her, but I know that right now I need to revel in the moments of just being with Rosie…as well as all the getting ready and planning before baby is born
This is so adorable and sweet. Congratulations
Thank you Melissa – I’m super chuffed
Absolutely LOVE this list! Note to self : MUST visit Babylonstoren!
It truly is lovely – you can just let your kids run wild and it’s safe and pretty
Yes please! You are so on point with this post. Thank you
Thank you Melissa for reading. x
This post hit the nail on the head!!! I actually commented on this on twitter last week! People find it weird that I never ask that question but after battling with infertility I know better than to ask. Between very close friends we might tease and joke about having 4-5 kids but that is where it ends and even say to one another right after a birth time to start trying for the next. I have learnt you don’t know someone’s story and you really don’t know if they want kids or not. So it is none of your business. I had people ask me before I had a kid – you know you are not getting any younger and even after the kid was born it was always when is the next one coming. Not sure how that is their business. My MIL was the worst she could never ask me directly but would ask my SIL who thankfully would tell her I think you should ask your son not me 🙁
Sometimes you can joke, when you know who you’re joking with. I have no problem with my mum asking because she knows everything about me but if you’re not that close with someone, you’re treading into a mine field. Better to never ask than see the pain reflected in someone’s eyes
Literally cannot agree with you more – I get asked all the time and little do these people (some close to me) know that I’ve actuallh just taken another (negative) pregnancy test. I also had a miscarriage and I couldn’t believe how insensitive people were – “so are you going to try again now because you’re so fertile after a D&C”. Can you even ?
Drives me up the wall
It makes my skin crawl this lack of empathy – are we just programmed to blurt out these impersonal questions? Never mind the fact that you need time to let your heal and yourself mourn after a miscarriage and now they want you to throw yourself into it straight away!
Oh yes. Thank you. I agree with you so much. Although people have generally stopped asking now. I do tell them I did try to have another one (unsuccessfully) I don’t mind telling them that. But it’s still invasive.
I’m thinking of, when someone asks me, of turning the question around and asking them how often they have unprotected sex….
Wow stunning photos of you two beautiful girls.
You should Add Eikendal Winery to this list. They have a lovely Children’s play area and even a kiddies tasting.
Interesting path. I like that you speak for the mom who wants to have a wine on the side or for cooking purposes.
Congratulations! I too was very nervous with my second pregnancy. First one ended in a miscarriage. This post reminds me of how emotional I was too. I cried and laughed so hard while watching Trevor Noah one night.
Great list. I think the helicopter ride is on my bucket list. Franschoek is idyllic
She’s such a cherub (you aren’t so bad either;). Stunning pics.
Thank you for this great read. It’s so honest and beneficial for us, small business owners. Would love to get to know you 🙂
@ladyandthelad_sa or you can visit my online store: http://www.ladyandthelad.co.za
X
Just stunning, I love the fabric!
Congrats on your pregnancy. Rosie is just so adorable.
Isn’t hindsight wonderful?! I’m not thinking about having another baby any time soon (still emotionally scarred from the first time round!) but I agree, there are SO MANY things I’d do differently. Some I’d do the same, but most of the things I’d do differently have to do with my need for control over the situation. Every time I’ve just relinquished control and allowed my son to show me what he wants to do, things turn out better. If I ever decide to be insane and have another child, I will try my best to remember that!
I was very careful not to listen to too much advice because there is SO much of it and so many different methods. This time round, it’s definitely less trial and error BUT, saying that, each child is so different. The best thing we did was to choose to be parents that were more relaxed, like yourself – you’re so right about relinquishing control!
Congrats on baby bump 2.0! We had a bigger bed made and slept with baby 1 and baby 2 in the same bed. When baby one was more into the fact that he was still prince 1 he was fine moving back into his own room. We eventually moved both out of our room. They still got into bed when they wanted to but they loved their own beds. Mine never wanted to take a dummy and believe me I tried every type on the market! it looked so much easier with other Moms and the dummies but on the other hand most of them battled to get rid of the dummies some even had dummies at age 4/5. Good luck and you will get as much advise if not more from other people and I also had the when are you trying for ….question as I only have sons!
Thank you so much Juli! Rosie couldn’t stand a dummy….but now, she’ll sometimes pop one in her mouth but fun. It’s never been a comfort thing for her…I am the comfort. Whilst we are pretty relaxed parents, the hardest thing is not to compare ourselves, especially myself, to other parents. Each child is so different and you can’t fit them into a box
All the best momma xoxo
Thank you lovely. x
I’m right there with you. Our lb is due end July & im totally freaking out… I don’t know how I’m going to mange a toddler & a newborn 🙄
I’m also much less organized this time around- nothing is ready!
I am living in this bubble of “I’ll organize everything the month before”….because life really is too crazy…and maybe because I’m trying to deny it. Ha!
Hi, I felt the exact same panic before my second baby boy was born. I became terrified that I would never ever sleep again, never have a moment for myself again, and probably my worst fear : What if big brother hated him and tried to hurt him ?! So in the months leading up to babies birth I talked and showed big brother Daniel tiger episodes with a new baby. He was 2 1/2 and couldnt care less.I told myself I would handle things as the problems arose and that I’ ve handled everything with No 1 so far. That gave me some comfort. We were also potty training at the time. But that last month of pregnancy he just stopped using the potty , so we decided to wait till after baby and boy was I glad we did that. And them came the day for baby to arrive. And I will never forget that first moment when big brother saw his new baby brother for the first time. His little face lit up with the biggest smile and with wonder and pride in his voice he said : Thats my baby brother ! And yes there was jealousy but like all things with the kids we handled it in the moment and he loves his brother sooo much. So hang in there mama ! It’s tough , I wont lie. But you can do it.
I really need to sit Rosie in front of these Daniel Tiger episodes!
The sleep is a BIG one, we’re still not at a stage of Rosie sleeping through the night consecutively and it is draining…now add a newborn. When I see her around other babies, she is fascinated and so gentle, so that is a relief there.
Thank you for the encouragement, we often just need a little push to let us know we can do it
I just had #3 two days ago. When we were expecting #2 my son was already 2 and tuned 3 before she was born. We talked a lot about the baby and watched the Daniel tiger episodes a ton of times at his request. We also got him big brother books. We brought him around my friend’s newborn so he could see what a new baby was like. This time he was all ready but his sister who just turned two last week was the newbie. Being a full year younger than he was when he got his first sibling, she understands a lot less. We just emphasized being nice to babies the whole time. So far so good, but we just got home from the hospital today, lol.
Fortunately, my close friend is due a month before me so I definitely want to introduce Rosie to a newborn. She’s very soft and gentle with the idea of a baby, and other kids that are younger than her…I just know that there could be some jealousy issues.
Remember how you weren’t prepared for what you were going to face the first time around because no-one can prepare you for the changes of a baby. Juggling two is a lot more daunting – but essentially, it’s too late to back out now!
My advice, plan and prep for the Bumpette, but ultimately, calm down, things will fall into place, some days are going to be tough, but you will fall into a pattern that works for you and your family!
Thanks Alet! I know it’s not going to always be easy, but the pattern is what we’re striving for – the means to have it work for all of us. x
Shante there will be things that feel exhausting and tough and other things will be so much easier because you’ve faced them before and survived ….it wont be long before you can’t remember what it was like to be 3 because 4 is so right…no 2 babies are the same and because you will hopefully be more relaxed generally baby will probably relax more….i remember popping Mathew in the play pen as a new born ( as a way to protect him from little sister being tooo attentive) whilst I washed the pots and tidy kitchen, he cried and i thought you will just have to wait mate i have to get this done..by the time i got to him he’d fallen asleep . helen would never have done that unless cuddled!! oh forget about going to loo or showering in peace ever again…mine still chat to me through the door !!! 😉 you learn to accept help more readily and Rosie will be fine…they are very adaptable.
praying you relax and enjoy being pregnant xx love janet cuthbert
Good points here. Also, remember to take it easy, because a newborn is overwhelming.
Gorgeous images. These kids are so adorable.
Thank you so much Melissa – I absolutely love how the photos came out
It was hard I’m not going to lie! For the actual day we had 2 nights in a swanky hotel and went nuts on room service, treatments, over priced dinners and are still recovering now! The good news is I’m now accepting and am 18 years old with 12 years experience!
That sounds like my kind of celebration – one where everything gets brought to me and I can just EAT. Maybe i can have a big-ass party next year as well… 😉
I love this post.
Marriage is not always beautiful but the harder you work at it, the more you will see the beauty of it.
Thank you so much Juwayra – it takes a tonne of hard work, absolutely but you’re so right, the more you work at it (from both sides) the better it is
I loved this article about Cindy, I read her blog every now and then, so I went to her article first. I suffer from Alopecia, and whilst my personnal journey is about accepting – as there is no known cure – it definitely resonated with me about how I am trying to teach my children to not be body conscious, and to accept difference..
SO excited for this!!
Isn’t it amazing the stories from the past of people we feel like we know. Beautifully shared Kathryn, and, as always Shanté, exquisitely captured.
What an incredible story, so beautifully told. Thank you for sharing so much of this part of you Kath! And the images are incredible Shante!
Beautiful story and images! Thank you Shantè 😀
Sending love , as always, Mands. X
So so beautiful. I am so amazed by how many of us share such differently lives but such similar struggles. The heart break that comes with wanting so desperately to have a child. Ah man. Thank you so much for sharing Chanel!
Love birth stories and this was one amazing read. incredible how you labored so quickly. Cece is absolutely gorgeous and I’m sure was worth all that pain.
It was super fast. Apparently, I can hold on to one fact, that if I do have another, it will be even quicker coz I’m an intensely quick laborer…. 😉
Such a exciting story to read. Thank you for sharing your experience, it’s amazing to see how different it is for everyone
Great read. What is it about birth stories? They’re so interesting. I had 2 at home drug free and totally agree with you, people putting hands or instruments anywhere near your vagina is the worst bit. Thank GOd for my midwife, she was awesome, no doctors involved.
I would love to read about your home birth – I contemplated it with my first but I found South Africa to not be very clued up for it, or perhaps I didn’t do my research enough
I’m sitting here in tears, it feels like Nikki is speaking straight from my heart. Having also had three miscarriages, I know the pain, the anguish, the trauma she describes. I love the concept you’ve chosen here – the quote about the laughing stars was almost my undoing this morning. Thank you Nikki for sharing in words and Shante for illustrating through images what my heart feels xx
I thought of you so much while I wrote this Gae. While your journey was so different to mine, I think our pain and sadness was similar.
💕💕
Hi
I recently started my own business and therefore I do not have a website yet. I do however have a facebook page. It is Gabz Fearfully & Wonderfully made with love.
I totally understand what Nikki went through. Having had a miscarriage, then a healthy baby, then 2 miscarriages and a blighted ovum, it is the most heart wrenching pain, especially when all your daughter wants is a baby sibling. The what if’s, anger, pain and heartache is awful. She finally got her baby sister when she was 6. We celebrated our rainbow baby’s 1st Birthday yesterday.
Congratulations on your daughter’s 1st birthday, Jean. It amazes me how these little people become like bandages for our souls.
I love a good birth story! 🙂
ps. If you ever do decide to do it again…have look at HypnoBirthing 😉 You will not be sorry, darling! X
I want to win this for ‘Bump’! I am an absolute lover of swaddling. It made life with Ben so much easier!
Thank you for the great giveaway! I’m in it to win it for my brand new little niece, Isla. As an only child, I was over the moon when my husband’s sister got pregnant – my chance to be an aunt! And I’m taking my responsibilities here very seriously! 🙂
After not having one for my first baby and still battling sleep with a toddler I would love this for my next baby ( currently 7 months pregnant!) and be because it’s a surprise the grey version is perfect for me! Crossing fingers and toes!
It looks so comfy! I want to win one for myself and #BabyBean of course. 🙂
I would love to win this for my sanity, my 6ish week little girl hates having her arms swaddled down or infront of her. This would be a dream
Would love to win this for my new baby girl. She loves being swaddled although still does not love sleeping 😴
Trying to transition my boy from the traditional swaddle and this would make my life so much easier💙
Would love to win this! Our first baby is due early January and this would be perfect for her!
I want to try this for my cat, Vader… just kidding! I also love my sleep and would like to help my little bub form good sleeping habits too!
I’d absolutely love to win this for my next little boy due 21 December. Fingers crossed!
I defintitely want to win for myself and my 3 month old
Please can I win it for my bump — baby girl is due November 23rd and I’d love to have it in time for her arrival
Everything on this list is a favourite, a must buy. Great list, thank you.
You’re too kind Melissa, thank you so much
Love all the ideas! Thanks
Such a great list. Thank you.
Ahhhh what a treat!
Fingers crossed
Love white chocolate! And those Whispers snowballs are a fave of mine too!
These products sound amazing
Your skin look fantastic!
Thank you so much hun!
Love this guide so much! Sharing this on DailyMomBlogs! Hope it throws some web traffic your way!
Ah thank you so much Patty!
I always find your blog very interesting. Thanks for the share.
Some of my favorites in there too ☺
Thank you for sharing your family life, your photographic passion, and your humor! Loved following along 😊
Thank you my love – you’re an incredible person to have in the mum tribe! x
I’ve never used any Pure Beginnings products before (shocking, I know) and I would LOVE to try their range. I’ve been sticking to another baby brand probably because I just don’t know any better about the products being used. Definitely a wake up call and a need to check and Google ingredients listed.
Hoping to win
Would love to try the Pure Beginnings range. We currently use the toothpaste and teething gel.
Thank you for this information – did not know any of it! Would love to try the Pure Beginnings products!
I used Pure Beginnings when they first came out with Elijah… and I’ve loved them ever since. Basically I’ve always been a hippy tree hugger and I don’t care for products that have junk in them… I’d rather make my own…
I’m switching to Pure Beginnings. Thank you Shante for educating me on this. I’m glad to have read this and watched the vids.
I really had no clue about some of these big brands. My hubby and I have started avoiding Nestlé products for a similar reasin.
Love that this product is natural! So important for babies to have natural products on their skin! Pregnant with my first little one. So excited to use this range! Would love to win!
I am a huge pure beginnings fan!!
Love pure beginnings!!!
Thanks for the lovely giveaway 💗🌸 would be amazing to win this and give these products a try
I love Pure Beginnings! Best product EVER!!!
As first time dads to be, you can imagine that we are taking in as much advice as possible! Without a doubt Pure Beginnings has been on our baby registry from the moment we found out the good news, so here’s hoping we can tick this off our list 🙂
first time mom and my lil one has eczema I’ve bought tons of products I don’t know what to use on her anymore that would actually work, this would be a nice giveaway for us 🙂
Pure Beginnings is the only product I use on my two babies. I absolutely love and trust Pure Beginnings
Fingers crossed for this lovely give away.
rashiedaadams101@gmail.com
Wow what an awesome review i have learned so many new things as a new mom
I would absolutely love to use this on my baby 😁thank you for the amazing advise
I would love to win. I’m pregnant with baby number 2 and would love to try the Pure beginnings products. Fingers crossed.
Definitely going to make the switch to New Beginnings for my girls, thanks for the review!
I’m the worst at lunchboxes but I always have emergency squish in the nappy bag for girls…..if it’s pear and rooibos I’ll sneak a taster as well. Omw have you tasted it? I’d love this prize
Wonderfull place! How much I’d like to go…… thanks for the dream
This is truly a great competition to win. I can relate to the squish life. @shante_hutton
My little son hates fruit, so I try and get as much nutrients in his body by Squish juice. Yogurt, Jelly and Custard. This would be a great competition to win, my son would be head over heels excited.
My oldest would polish off anything I put in front of him (still does), so gave me a false sense that I knew what I was doing when it came to weaning my daughter – well about that!! She isn’t a fan of most things I make and a lot of it ends up on the floor. But she does love these, which has been amazing! So my go to when we going out. At least i know she will eat something
Squish is the best thing ever!! My daughter loves it and I love giving it to her because I know it is healthy!! Would looooove to win this 🖤
This would be amazing for my toddler!
I really don’t like the weaning process. I’m not one who enjoys cooking in the first place so to still do baby food is the pits for me. Goodies like these that are nutritious, healthy and ready to go are right up my alley!
My 1 year old loves her Squish i could try and feed her anything else but she wouldn’t have it lol!!! This would be great ❤️
I’d be absolutely delighted if I were to be given an opportunity to try this amazing brand for my little one. It’s super handy as well and looks super delish! Especially when you’ve got 2 fussy kids (can anyone say, ‘lucky mama’?!) haha I’ll add in our smoothie recipes for bub as he is now teething heavy so the zoku pop maker is a recipe for success, yum! My email is neelofah.h@gmail.com
We’ve been using Squish for years! Both kids love it and we add it to smoothies!
I have a confession to make… sometimes I eat Squish (before I had a baby) so now I don’t need any excuse to indulge and of course I will share lol!
Eek love Rhodes. The jelly is yummy.
I’d really love to be able to be given this opportunity as it’s my wedding anniversary coming up this month, 10th March along with my birthday on the 25th March. It’s been a crazy few months, what with getting retrenched just a month after giving birth then hubby getting retrenched after 15 years within 3 months of my retrenchment so it’s been alot of financial sacrifices, crazy chaos so no fancy schmancy or any celebrations here – this would be absolutely perfect! Keeping fingers crossed. Xx
Never heard the words “getaway” in a while!! I could actually cry! The last getaway my husband and I had, was our honeymoon two years back. Forgetting about responsibilities for two nights sounds like a dream come true. Never really had an opportunity to even think of a getaway because of obstacles. But this is beautiful.
I love my husband and son so much and this would be amazing. Especially the outdoors of nature and the pool. Since my little man adores any slight appearance of water he sees he just messes! Love it!
If unfortunately I don’t win this competition, Windfall Guest Cottages would be one for the books!
Oh wow this sounds like such a great prize! Would love to win. Not able to Like your Facebook page, though, would you mind posting the link again? Good luck to everyone 🙂
I love Robertson! Would be so awesome to win this 😀
winner winner wine for dinner
You always propose exceptional products….. Thanks for the share
Would love a long overdue weekend away with my fam ♥️
These are all great suggestions. Thanks for the share
I am interested in opening a baby store that sell local brand here in south africa and also outside the country. But most local brand do not supply wholesale.
Hi there
If this is something you would like to do, please contact me
http://www.babafishees.com
Oh wow! I just came across your website to find you rated us for our bedding!
Thank you ever so much!!!!
It’s a pleasure Kim!
Sat at my desk just reading all of them. sooo so soo good. RAW, inviting, sad but positive and awesome.
I am so amazed by what you are doing here. It’s incredible and it’s healing. Good for you.
So beautiful. I’ve also traveled this road but the words and pictures here are just incredible.
Such a good, crazy (obviously, this is you writing) and valuable read. Thank you.
😉 thank you so much for the comment hun! I so appreciate it.
It was an incredible event and I loved seeing how everyone’s personality came out with the art (and the wine!)
These are really good. Everything on this list is definitely needed especially snacks. The last thing you want in a confined car or plane is a hungry child.
I am a girl mom and a boy mom; my daughter never showed any interest in playing with dolls; my son enjoys it. I’m just happy that they are comfortable to play with the toys that they want to play with and not feel like they are pressured to stay in any particular box!
Ethan loved to play with dolls. As he got older though, I think the boys at his creche influenced him to stop playing with them. But he will still hold and cuddle some of Harper’s babies when he thinks we’re not looking. I have no issues with boys playing with dolls. Will they not grow up to be dad’s, uncles, husbands? Do we not want to teach them to be nurturing and loving to children?
Family is always the first place. I saved so many photos that my phone can not afford, lol.
We have such a great bunch of talented makers in South Africa…
Great list
Thank you so much for these points – I’ve been so tempted to keep all the guests happy that I’ve forgotten to think about my fiancé and me 🙈
Absolutely brilliant post Shante! Hit all the nails on the head as usual
Added to favourites! Thank you for taking the time to write this. Personally, I especially need a reminder every now and again to grow a thick skin (damn you perfect, beautiful instagram feeds) and understand my worth. x
Great post Shante!
At this point, you’ve said it all. I actually jumped up and said “THANK YOU!” when you defined the word ‘gift’. It’s simple, but oh so misconstrued
Wow! Beautiful venue and beautiful photos! I NEED a break just like this. Glad you all could take a mini break to wind down a little 🙂
Thank you so much darling – it was so needed for us
This is one of the best Christmas gift guides I have ever seen! Thank you so very much for sharing this – I know this must have been a lot of work to put together but you made my life so much easier 😀
The home / office section was my fav. Great guide friend. Thanks for taking the time to put it together.
Thank you for compiling this great list. Looking forward to getting to know some new small businesses!
I have just started a business selling lovely handmade mobiles/garlands. http://www.honestnestco.co.za or @honestnestco if you’d like to check it out!
My plan was to hide 76543 chocolate eggs and then go and enjoy a bottle of wine while they search… Now I can enjoy a bottle of wine and a hot cross bun with these extra activities 😉 Thanks, Shante!
Hahaha I LOVE your plan!
Thank you so much for sharing. These are amazing.
Thank you so much hun!
Those are awesome! Thank you so much.
Yay, so glad you can enjoy them!
Thanks for this my friend!!!
Thank you so much for using it hun!
Hi there Shante Hutton,
Thank you for compiling such a lovely list. I would love to chat sometime. I am the creator behind SNAPZ Dummy Strapz, this is our Facebook page
Perhaps you would be interested in reviewing our product?
We look forward to hearing from you 🙂
https://web.facebook.com/search/top?q=Baby%20Dummy%20Snapz
Such an incredible guide! This must have taken you ages to put together. Thank you so very much for sharing.
Okay I LOVE this!!! So many cool His & Her brands I didn’t know about. Thank you so much for sharing. And for that mention at the end… really appreciate it my friend. THANK YOU